The Kadizzles celebrate The Feast of the Lazy

As Fran slowly cooks the leg of lamb on the barbie it is time for the Saturday night bath. As is the custom the women go first. Once the women are properly chlorinated they are ready for the feast of the lazy. The feast of the Lazy starts the most high holy season. The feast of the lazy is a tradition to celebrate the birth of the first grandchild. In Orthodox Kadizzelism a child born in a year with a good June berry harvest is thought to be a special blessing. To end the feast June Berry pie will be served warm with ice cream. Part of the tradition is to hide the remaining pie until morning. In the morning if no one has found the pie over night another pie ritual is performed that involves a terrible fight over the remaining pie. It is considered a curse to have any pie left by high noon. As the mother superior shouts "That's Megan's pie" the other members of the clan try to sneak as much as possible without being found out. Tradition holds that the pie is magic and disappears by itself.

Bee Bumble Bee and her neice Ticklepinch

Of course they would have matching swim suites

Why Conrad will not support Public Option

Conrad likes that insurance company loot, and hates to go against the Republicans in North Dakota so here is the story he told Ezra Klien. It is a total cop out and crock of shit, but it is the best he can do.

Do you support the public option?

No.

Why?

I go back to the T.R. Reid book. I don't think a government-run plan best fits this culture. A plan that's not government-run has the best chance of succeeding in being passed into law.

Second, and this is very important to my thinking, the public option as defined by the committee of jurisdiction in the House, the Ways and Means Committee, is tied to Medicare levels of reimbursement. My state has the second-lowest level of Medicare reimbursement in the country. If my state is tied to that reimbursement, every hospital goes broke.

People say, "Just fix it." I've been on the Finance Committee more than 15 years. I've been trying to fix the unfair aspects of Medicare reimbursement all the time. We run into the House. Membership is determined by population, and the big population states write levels of reimbursement that unfairly treat hospitals in states like mine. My hospitals get one-half as much as urban hospitals to treat the same illnesses.

What about a public plan that can't use Medicare rates?

There are discussions going on about that. Obviously, it would be very important that it would be clear that it's not tied to Medicare levels of reimbursement. Those of us in low-reimbursement states would have our health infrastructure put at risk.

SNL Perfects Beck Imatation

Barbra Walters, and Whoopie confront lying Scum Beck

Glenn Beck Gets Torched on The View - watch more funny videos

Glenn Beck and the Hoopleheads

Hardly a day goes by that Glenn Beck does not just pull some fact out of thin air. If he were ever confronted with the question "How do you verify that?", poor old Glenn would have to say I forgot the name of the source, just like he did with the crowd count at the million moron march. The Hoopleheads figure if Glenn Said it it is true. Limbaugh pulls the same crap. There was a fight on a school bus between some black kids and a white kid. Limbaugh said Obama caused it. Just made it up out of nowhere, but the Hooples eat it up. Lord Kadizzle has never met a Hooplehead that understands the concept of research or proof, or scientific investigation. A Hoople figures if uncle Willy believes it, that is good enough for me. People used to get lynched in the south. Most of them were convicted with Hooplehead logic. You have a major network, Fox that deals in nothing but scaring Hoopleheads with fabricated nonsense, this scares Lord Kadizzle. Take a Hooplehead under you wing and gently explain to them how you can find out if something is true.

Kadizzle to fight midget on behalf of Blue Cross

Lord Kadizzle will fight a midget today to raise money for Blue Cross to lobby against the public option. Yesterday, the president of Blue Cross in Fargo said he was for competition. To show the kind of competition Blue Cross is for Kadizzle will fight a midget in front of Blue Cross today. Fuzzy Cupid the famous midget wrestler has agreed to the bout. Kadizzle weighs well over two hundred pounds. Fuzzy comes in at 68lbs and is four feet tall. Some of Kadizzles family members have put money on Fuzzy. Kadizzle will wear skin tight leotards and have a big Blue Cross on them. The midget will be dressed as the public and will have a screw on his outfit. This will represent how the public is getting screwed by not having a public option. Senator Conrad has agreed to referee the bout and has assured everyone the public option has no chance as long as the insurance lobby gives him his 1.6 million for being referee.

How The Republicans are defeating health care

BREAKING NEWS: BAT LOOSE IN CONGRESS

Hug a Hater Day

Lord Kadizzle just found out it is hug a hater day. Fox News is going to have to be shut down with all the hugs they will be getting. Rush Limbaugh will be overwhelmed.

Glenn Beck's new book "Dare to be Stupid"

If you could build a sieve that would sift out the hoopleheads it might involve Glenn Beck. Anyone who would watch and believe that raving lunatic would fit through the big holes in the sieve. Beck has reached a new low in spin and scare journalism. Beck's new book "Dare to be Stupid", explains in detail how instead of thinking you just feel things. If it feels like it fits believe it seems to be the secret to daring to be stupid. If you feel scared, then you are scared, so listen to Beck and he will tell you what to be scared about. Change is one thing you got to be scared of. Obama is a scary black man, and no matter what he says or does it is scary and socialist inspired. Being stupid means someone is always trying to get something from you like taxes, or your rights, or your gun. Being stupid is a relatively simple process, but if you are stupid, Beck needs a whole book to tell you how to improve on your paranoia. Beck himself made a great leap into stupidity when he became a Mormon. Read about that gang of idiots and you will see how Beck got his start in stupidity. Remember they are the ones that found the sacred tablets under a rock in New York.

The Good Ship Soveriegn is on the hard

As they say in the vernacular, the good ship Sovereign is on the hard. Yesterday the boat came out of the water for the season. Sovereign must have thought it was too early and resisted, but after a lot of struggle the boat was finally on the trailer and stored for winter.

A brief Introduction

Hooplehead logic is amazing. Watch the old video below to see Rush Limbaugh, and Glenn Beck in action. Then go on to the other story below. Claghorn used to live up the street from me and is a firm believer in hooplehead logic. According to Claghorn as you will note in the video, "The South did not lose the Civil War, it was called on account of darkness". This is how hoopleheads think.

Video That goes with Claghorn story skip to 1.18sec

Hooplehead Logic with Senator Claghorn

Yesterday Lord Kadizzle met Senator Claghorn at the local slummers paradise store. Kadizzle had been anxious to meet Claghorn to get his reaction to Kadizzle's latest rant in the Guzuntiet Gazette. The Guzuntiet Gazette is the local paper. Kadizzle knew steam would come out Claghorn's ear when he read Kadizzle's attack on the Hoopleheads.

A major part of the letter dealt with the Hoopleheads reaction to Obama's recent speech to school children. Kadizzle asked Claghorn "What was wrong with the speech, he just told the kids to study hard, stay in school and take responsibility for themselves?". Claghorn replied "It was all just Conservative philosophy". Kadizzle "Isn't that what you believe in?". Claghorn "Yes, but Obama doesn't believe it, so he should not have said it to school children". Kadizzle " Wow, Claghorn, Obama says to the kids exactly what any conservative would call ideal and he is criticized?". So it turns out according to Claghorn that conservatives have a monopoly on studying hard, personal responsibility, and staying in school.

Rush started criticizing the speech before Obama ever made it. Rush, and the other right wing dingers were sure that there would be something in it they could attack. When it turned out the speech contained nothing they disagreed with, they claimed it was a trick, because Obama did not really believe it. Claghorn was parroting the Hooplehead doctrine put out by Rush. So as it turns out, no matter what Obama said it was wrong. If he agreed with the Hooples it was a trick and if he didn't he was a dirty socialist. This is Hooplehead logic it is infallible. Claghorn served in the ND legislature for many years and his most famous quote was "Education just confuses people", good thing Rush doesn't.

Dare to be Stupid

Lord Kadizzle just thought of a new feature for the Kadizzled Blog. "Dare to be stupid". Today will be the first entry. Two of my sailing friends decided to sail downwind to an Island. Late in the day the weather was predicted to come from the direction they had to return to with a vengence. As predicted the wind howled from 30 to 35. It looked like they were going to make it back before the big blow, but Click of the Click and Clack team relized he forgot his shoes on the island. Well back to the island they went. Now the hurricane force winds were blowing. So Click and Clad spent the night on the island. This morning Kadizzle had to take a boat trailer and retrieve them from the eastern edge of the lake. Kadizzle had his own round of dare to be stupid. Kadizzle had the idea he could bring the sail boat back with the mast up. Kadizzle scouted a route thru a farmers field that he thought would get him around the only power line. Kadizzle had done the same stupid sailing stunt himself twenty years ago and recalled there was only one power line in the way. Not very long into the journey another power line appeared. By a mirical there was a simple way around. Just as we got to the highway, yet another power line appeared that had not been there twenty years ago. At this point the dare to be stupid crew had to take the mast down. Had we hit a power line with the mast we could surely have won the contest for the year.

Boycott Glenn Beck and all of Fox News

Lord Kadizzle is an extreme advocate of free speech. Glenn Beck has every right to say as he wishes. However, Lord Kadizzle does not have to buy from people who support him. Few people with a good message have a hard time being heard. The bad news is some people feed on hate speech, the kind Limbaugh, and Beck sell by the ton. If you don't want to see these demagogues lead us into the mess Hitler created, you need to do something. You can go to Color of Change web site and sign up to boycott Beck's sponsors. A host of respectable companies have left him already including Wal Mart, Best Buy and sixty others. This is American do what you want, but Kadizzle is joing the boycott. Kadizzle calls every 800 number on Becks sponsors and tells them what he thinks about this nut case.

Take a Hooplehead to lunch and read this to them

What Bush did to the economy. From today's New York Times. "Last week, the Census Bureau released a statistical report on the last year of George W. Bush’s presidency. The numbers were brutal. On every indicator, Americans lost ground during the Bush era. The median income slumped. The poverty rate increased. The percentage of Americans without health insurance rose." If the Hooplehead could just realize that tax breaks for the rich is nothing more than an illusion this mess would not have occurred. Read the whole story for yourself. If you are a hooplehead and have an explanation of why this is not so, please share it.

Met Jesus on a motorcycle, had Mary along

Lord Kadizzle has wanted to confront the local preachers about health care for everyone. Yesterday as Kadizzle filled the truck with gas he noticed a local preacher on his Harley, on the back was his wife. Realizing this was the equivalent of Joseph taking Mary to the manger I confronted the preacher to get his views. Kadizzled explained to the preacher his disappointment that none of the preachers had the balls to speak up about health care. Apparently preachers don't have balls, they believe in virgin birth. Next, the conversation evolved into what the preacher did believe. When Kadizzle mentioned Rush, and all the other right wing liars, the preacher said he listened to and believed them all. We were off to the races. Mary piped up about how the main goal was to prevent socialism, not help each other. The important thing was freedom. Mary wanted a country where you were free to be as dumb as you want, and spread it. Mary asked Kadizzle "Do you have a personal relationship with Jeeeesus?". Kadizzle explained he had a personal relationship with The Commander, and the Commander was pretty particular about who else he could have these relationships with". Men in flowing robes and sandels were questionable. After Kadizzle explained to the Biblical Harley saints that the fire department was socialist, the police were socialist, and the Medicare they were getting was socialist. Mary said Medicare was alright because they paid for it. Apparently in socialist countries they don't pay for anything, even what the government provided. After talking to the preacher motorcycle gang it became apparent Jeesus was more worried about taxes than health care.

When Kadizzle went in the gas station to buy his diet coke, he stood at the head shaking his head in disbelief about what a redneck preacher he had just met. The clerk said is something wrong. Kadizzle explained he just found out Jeeesus was against health care for everyone. Mary told him it was up to Christians to take care of each other, "but it doesn't work" she said. So until we get Jeeesus on our side things look pretty dim in Hazen.

Bee Bumble Bee (A.K.A. Megan Quinn) hits bigtime

Lucky Magazine and People Style are featuring my talented daughter this month.

It is a beautiful day in the Neighbor Hood

It is a beautiful day in the neighborhood, would you, could you be my neighbor? One reason Kadizzle lives where he does, is because he has good neighbors. Tolerant people always willing to help and share. If more people could have different opinions, but get along like we do on Kadizzle lane the world would be better.

One of the best recent developments in our little burg is the return of the midgets. In the last year the population of small people has exploded. Lord Kadizzle enjoys kids on the street. It is fun just to have them around. Up on the corner are the potato heads. The potato heads are usually out in the yard wandering around aimlessly. Across the street is Biscuit and Gravy's family. Gravy is one of the older members of the gang on the street. Gravy has figured out old Lord Kadizzle is goof for some diet coke or other goody. Recently Gravy was out in his back yard pouring every flavor of drink mix into a jug. The result was Gravy juice, a strange mixture that taste like lime, cherry, orange, and grape.

Sing Along, Glenn Beck Scare Me

Fox News reports fake murder story from ACORN video as fact

Fox News reports fake murder story from ACORN video as fact

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Fooling Hoopleheads 101 with Glenn Beck

Last night Glenn Beck was puffing up his million moron march on Washington. Official estimates of the number of people were 70,000. Glenn likes the number 2 million better. Glenn some "Some college, I can't remember, did a photo study and put the number at 2 million". Of course Glenn cannot remember the name of the college, because then you could check the facts, but the Hoopleheads just take his word for it. Hoopleheads think that if you heard it at the coffee shop it is evidence admissible in court. Facts are pretty cheap for Hoopleheads.

Don't Blame Me

Young people are getting blasted every day by the legacy of the Bush administration. As my children and yours grow older they will find out how broke they are because of what the George Bush's and Glenn Becks did to them. Are they paying attention no. As of all people Cody from up the street pointed out on Facebook today, nobody notices the sorrowful performance of Joe Wilson, or for that matter even knows who he is, but every little twitter bug got upset because a rapper took the microphone from a country singer at an awards ceremony. Cody grew up with my kids and actually seems to notice what is really going on. The rest of the bumble heads are stuck on planet "People Magazine". It is easy for my generation of right wing dingers to cheat the next generation by charging the future to them. Simple create a deversion like a black guy spewing some rap.

Billionairs for Wealthcare

Fox News Recipe for a good fantasy

" Fox Fantasy Recipe
1. A small dash of a distorted fact
2. An slice of hate, cook until it turns the color you don't like
3. A large portion of fear
4. Fresh diced urban myths involving minorities or Mexicans

Mix the distorted facts with the fear. Cook until any reality is unrecognizable. Garnish with the hate, and serve in a bowl labeled truth at the coffee shoppe. A small portion will serve a whole crowd of idiots. "

Glenn Beck calls himself a hopeless alcoholic

Fair and Balanced, my Ass

The following is from a story about Obama coverage in the Washington Post. The battle cry of Fox News is Fair and Balanced. This is an independent survey of "Fair and Balanced" on Fox.

The most favorable evaluations appeared in front-page Times stories (61 percent positive), while ABC's "World News" was the most positive newscast (53 percent positive) and "NBC Nightly News" the least (45 percent positive). Separately, the study found that Obama's coverage was just 23 percent positive on the news segments of "Special Report," Fox News's Washington newscast.

Fox News the wonderful network of hate, racism, and lies, brought to you by Hanity, Beck, and O'Rielly. My daughter shocked me when she told me the other night Bill O the clown was actually question some their own lies. Perhaps he forgot Glenn Made them up.

Plain Vinilla Racism

Most people in North Dakota have never talked to a black person. It is as if someone from another planet became president. Worse yet the black man speaks well and is very well educated. This creates confusion and fear among the right wing hoopleheads. Take time to read what Maureen Dowd says in the NYT today. Lord Kadizzle has been very reluctant to come to this conclusion, but at some point the evidence becomes overwhelming.

Hoopleheads spotted in Hazen

You don't see the Hoopleheads too often, but I spotted them getting ready to go to the Glen Beck hate rally this morning. Normally they are scared a Black man might yell "Socialism" at them. The Hooples kept their kids home so they did not get encouraged to learn anything by the Black President. The Hoople told their kids "If we need to know something Fox News will tell us". PG on the far right reminded them that "Education just confuses people". When the Hooples get to Washington with their Tea Bag Friends they are going to get to hear a whole new version of how the Earth was formed.

Getting Scared is Fun

If you ever watch little kids they actually like to get scared. A lot of adults never outgrow the idea. Remember Y2K when all the computers were going to fail and the world was going to end? Remember 9/11 when the world was going to go into complete turmoil? The list goes on and on, but life also goes on and these mega disasters never quite materialize. When they do we live through it. We lived through the depression. The right wing knows nothing sells to the Hoopleheads like fear. Someone is going to get your money, someone is going to read your mail, someone is going to take your Bible. Fear is the best possible motivators for Hoopleheads. Once the Hoopleheads are in panic the sharks run in and rob them. Never fails. Who buys when the market is at the bottom. Yup it is the people who know times will get better. Watching Fox knews whip up the Hoopleheads has become an addictive passtime for Lord Kadizzle. Fox uses every cheap trick in the book. The ultimate demagague is Gleen Beck. What a nut case. These crazies constantly contradict themselves, but the Hoolpes never notice. They make predictions that are proven wrong time after time, and the Hooples don't notice. Obama's speech was going to advocate communism Rush Limbaugh said. After the speech Limbaugh said "The speech was full of conservative principles". Now which is it Rush? Rush is a classic. Never are callers allowed to get through to him who disagree with him. When one fools the screeners it is a blast to hear the wind bag hit with reality. Lets all listen to right wing radio, Fox News and get worked into a frenzy and run. That is far better than just putting out the fire and going on with life.

Against sunshine, rain, hope, and the Future

The spoil sport Republicans would not clap for Jesus if he appeared. They sit there against sunshine, rain, hope, and the future. Sorrowful people stuck in the past. It was sad to see elected officials so caught up in supporting corporations and the rich that they seemed offended by the idea of letting the peasants have health care. President Obama gave an excellent inspirational speech last night, but it apparently turned the the Republicans to stone. The idea that a man could speak full coherent sentences stunned them after eight years of their hero Bubba Bush. They sat there like stunned school children being chided for a prank. Indeed they should be ashamed. Led by their lame Fox News lunatics these gangsters of greed spread their hate and racism and feed on the simple mindedness of the hoopleheads.

Hooplehead Sparklers

Watching the Hoopleheads is amazing. Yesterday Obama gave his speech to school children. The Hoopleheads had been told by Rush it would be a communist manifesto. Then Rush said it was nothing but what conservatives have believed in all along. Did the Hoopleheads realize the contradiction that their drug crazed god made? Nope the Hoople just keep on spinning. Now, after Sara Palin has been totally discredited with her "Death Panel " lies, she is going to give it another go. The leming Hooples just sit in front of Glen Beck and get their dose of simple mindedness. There is no hope. How can the Hooples who make up about 25% of the population have such a devestating effect on reality.

Lord Kadizzle and Jasper Littlebottom

Do I really live on this planet?

Listening to Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck make me wonder if by mistake Lord Kadizzle landed on the wrong planet. To hear the total nonsense of these people shot out over the airwaves, and know people soak it up and believe it shock me. Glen Beck has gone totally nuts. Last night it was terrific watching Kieth Olberman make fun of him, but to think people actually believe the lunacy he shoots out amazes me.

On the way to Bismarck yesterday my old right wing nut case friend that used to live up the street told me he believes there are "Death Panels". Obama is going to speak to school children to encourage them to get good grades and the lunies are saying it is a communist plot. Do I really live on this planet? Can we really be this stupid and still exist?

Schedule your lake fires.

Lord Kadizzle and Dennis Dietz went up to the lake today for a little sail and some repair work. First we stopped at Kit's marina to fix a cable on Bill's boat. When we drove in Kadizzle made a swing through the boat parking lot. Some fellow was there working on his RV. While speaking with Captian Kit the Pick City fire siren went off, so we went out to see what was going on. The RV fellow had managed to set his RV on fire. Kadizzle helped move a boat and camper away from the emolution. As the fire progressed the propane tanks released with a nice effect, and the gas tank also added it's excitement. However, the effect every movie has never occurred, there was no explosion. Apparently no one was available for the Pick City volunteer fire department. Everyone was working. Same for Riverdale. So even though the fire siren made a nice sound nothing happened. When the Hazen Fire dept arrived about an hour after the fire started everything was gone. The moral of the story is schedule your Pick City Fires during evening hours or weekends. The fire department is not open from during working hours.

Life as a Young Person in Woodsdale

My sister Kate the great historian of Wheeling, West Virginia asked me to write something about growing up in Woodsdale. Woodsdale was the suburb in Wheeling where Lord Kadizzle mastered the art of insanity.


MyLife as a young person in Woodsdale seems as far away as Jupiter. The things that happened in Woodsdale seem like remembering tribal rituals from another planet. Young people on the planet Woodsdale were incessant explorers always seeking the unknown. The unknown was everywhere. The United States has NASA, but Woodsdale had WASA, Woodsdale Aliens Seeking Adventure. The fartherst reach of the galaxy from Poplar Avenue was somewhere in the extreme envirionment of Stratford Hill. WASA idiotornots well equipped with all the left over World War Two material that could be found in atticts in the neighborhood. The young explorers would head to the hill with bayonets, canteens, and machettes strapped to their sides. Big Rock was the first major find outside the terrestial limits of the paved streets. I can remeber sitting on the rock eating what was then space food, penut butter and jelly sandwitches. Sitting on the rock the young explorers talked about how the chief of the Stratford Indians used to sit on the rock with the tribe below him and make great proclimations. Such as "All Indians must be home before Dark".

As we got older we pushed the limit of the known universe clear to the old cistern that was part of the original Stratford Hill Hotel. One night when we were older we actually slept in that cistern and shot mice all night with a BB gun.

Back in the settled part of the universe the idiotornots explored every known nook and crany of the old houses in the neighborhood. Inevitably the small band of boys nested. The nest were under porches. Each of the old houses had a little door somewhere that allowed access under the porch. Who ever built the house must have know that at some point young boys would need a place to smoke cigars, look at Playboy Magazine, and plot to get into trouble. The person who built the porches did not proveid for lighting, so candles were the main source of light. By some miricale we never burnt a house down. Sorry to say that the meeting places were well stocked with cigars and cigarettes provided courtesy of the Drug Store. A certian member of the gang who will not be named had no hesitation to relieve "Doc Hanger" of all the cigars we needed. I remember refering to the old pharmacist as "Doc Hanger" because either Doc or the custormer would always greet one another by saying "How's it hanging?". Judging by the amount of smoking we did it is amazing no one had cancer by age twelve.

I am sure my father must have know what was going on under our back porch. One day I can remember sitting under the porch smoking when the kitchen door opened. My father stepped outside to give a soliliquy. His words were " It sure smells smokey out here, some day I will have to look and see where all that smoke is coming from". We all felt like we had been shot at and missed.

If there was a hole we went in it. If there was a culvert or a tunner we went thru it. If there was a tree we went up it. Climbing on the roof didn't bother us a bit. We ruined a lot of expensive slate roofs. The drop from the gutters on our roof to the ground was about thirty feet. One day sitting near the peak of the roof on our house the piece of slate I was sitting on came loose and like a sled propelled me down to the gutter. With certiantity I thought I was going over. By a mirical I managed to stop myself in the old fashing wide gutter. If it had been a modern home I would be a foot shorter to this day, or have my head peaking out a small hole in my blue jeans.

One of the earliest lessons I learned was with Steven Leibold. Steven and I had heard what fun kids were having breaking windows down at the old skating rink where Elby's is now built. The building was going to be torn down for the interstate so kid seemed to think it was harmless to throw stones thru the windows. Steve and I rode our bikes down to the big old building and started tossing stones. We had hardly broken a window when a pickup truck pulled out from behind the building and came at us at very high speed, seeming with the intention of running us over. The guy was going so fast that he missed us and turned to come back. Somehow we started peddling faster than I knew a bike could go. We headed under the railroad passageway and immediately ducked into the bushes. The truck went screaming by shortly after that. As I young person it left a lasting impression on my of "What could possibly go wrong". Ever there after I always asked myself that question before committing some act that had the potential for exploding. Incedently I have spent my life in the field of Safety Management. This was indeed the creed I have always tried to instill in the simple minded.

The Commander and Ticklepinch

A good sailing story about Ted Kennedy

A hunting friend told me about this tribute to Ted Kennedy, if you are a sailor you will enjoy the story. It is in two parts. It has a ring about it that reminds me of many lake adventures. More than anything about the time The Commander and Lord Kadizzle raced a 19ft catermeran in 35knts of wind.

Part two sailing story

I'll be with you when the deal goes down

These are the lyrics to "When the deal goes down". Gaurantee you if you have not heard this Bob Dylan song you will like it.



In the still of the night, in the world's ancient light
Where wisdom grows up in strife
My bewildering brain, toils in vain
Through the darkness on the pathways of life
Each invisible prayer is like a cloud in the air
Tomorrow keeps turning around
We live and we die, we know not why
But I'll be with you when the deal goes down

We eat and we drink, we feel and we think
Far down the street we stray
I laugh and I cry and I'm haunted by
Things I never meant nor wished to say
The midnight rain follows the train
We all wear the same thorny crown
Soul to soul, our shadows roll
And I'll be with you when the deal goes down

Well, the moon gives light and it shines by night
When I scarcely feel the glow
We learn to live and then we forgive
O'r the road we're bound to go
More frailer than the flowers, these precious hours
That keep us so tightly bound
You come to my eyes like a vision from the skies
And I'll be with you when the deal goes down

Well, I picked up a rose and it poked through my clothes
I followed the winding stream
I heard the deafening noise, I felt transient joys
I know they're not what they seem
In this earthly domain, full of disappointment and pain
You'll never see me frown
I owe my heart to you, and that's sayin' it true
And I'll be with you when the deal goes down

The good old Urban Legend

Yesterday Lord Kadizzle got an email about how the song "In God We Trust" has been banned by radio stations. Sounds strange doesn't it? When you read these things you can always smell something fishy. The key to this one was the fact that no specific radio station was mentioned. When these rumors are spread they always use the technique of being vague. Of course if the thing was entirely traced to its roots it turns out the implication is somehow Obama is behind it. Now we all know there is a a crowd that believes Obama is the Anti Christ out to do us in. People afraid of black people naturally will be prone to believe Obama doesn't want you to have "In God we Trust" on our money. Being afraid, paranoid, and hopped up on foolishness is what used to lead to lynchings and all the other fun things of the far right. The Snopes site does a good job of busting these phony rumors. If you suspect you are being fed a story check it out. Sometimes you don't even have to go that far. When Sara Palin declares there are "Death Panels" you should take it at face value to be a bunch of nonsense.

Part two Conrad VS Kadizzle

Driving while High

Yesterday the Kadizzle crew drove to the top of Mount Evans. Mount Evans is the highest point in North America you can reach by car on a paved road. The road is treacherous and Kadizzle was amazed the area was not littered with cars that missed a curve.

Lying and spinning

Don't buy a car from Chrysler or GM. This is the advice from Rush Limbaugh because both companies belong to Obama. Can you imagine the ultimate pig Rush telling people this. Glen Beck, Rush Limbaugh, Bill O the clown and the rest of the Fox News gang are truly trying to destroy the country with hate and lies.

Shoot Out with Senator Conrad in Center ND

A nice gathering of hoopleheads appeared in Center today to question Senator Conrad about health care. First they heard from a "Panel". Panel members got to give a nice little speech about their thoughts on health care before Conrad spoke. Of course the panel members all took the pro Conrad "No Public Option" approach. Before Conrad spoke Lord Kadizzle interrupted and asked why someone could not give a speech in favor of the Public Option. Conrad should be credited for his willingness to let Lord Kadizzle speak. Lord Kadizle gave a speech favoring the public optioin and chided Conrad for thinking he could side up to the right, and still have the left in his pocket.

During the public gathering of course socialism and abortion had to be tied to health care reform. Go to one of these meetings and learn how hoopleheads feed on misinformation. It is a good experience.

One of top Three Spots to overnight on the lake

Captain Quinn gets new Wheel for Truck

Click on the Picture to see a nice view of The Badlands

Don't talk to the Canadians

What an amazing experience. This morning Lord Kadizzle had a long discussion with two Canadians at the Hazen RV park. His Lordship asked them how they like Canadian health. They said they loved it. When told about what Kadizzle had to say about American health care and what it cost they were amazed. Lord Kadizzle also asked about all the scary stories Fox News and the right wingers are putting out. They just laughed. The woman was a nurse in the Canadian system, so she certianly was in a positon to know something about it.

When I walked out the door my old right wing friend was cutting the grass in front of the RV park. I told him to go in and have a little conversation with the Canadians. He steadfastly refused. He wanted his view of Canadian health care provided by Fox News. What Canadians had to say about their health care mattered little to him. The truth could only be obtained on Fox News. The Canadians tell me they pay $400 dollars per year. I pay $821, with a $2,000 deductable. When the Canadians come to our country they have to take out special insurance because out system is so out of control. If you want to keep your head in the right wing fog, don't talk to the Canadians.

Update on Conrad

Last night Lord Kadizzle talked to Senator Conrad in person at the Beulah Civic Center. Conrad said he could not support the public option because it would bankrupt hospitals in North Dakota. Instead Conrad is proposing health cooperatives, which may not be such a bad idea.

When the question session came up Kadizzle asked Conrad why the government did not raise money by removing the social security exemption for those making more than 106k. Conrad dodged the question and talked about offshore tax havens. I have directly asked Senator Dorgan the same question with the same result. At the same time I asked what the Democrats would do about the extreme concentration of wealth in our country by the top one percent. Again no answer. Taxing the rich seems out of the question for both Conrad and Dorgan. My faith in the Democrats is getting shaky.

Senator Conrad surrenders to Hoopleheads

North Dakota is plagued with people who believe in Rush Limbaugh and believe in the death panels of Sara Palin. Instead of confronting these people directly, Conrad has chosen to play into their hands. Conrad says he will not go along with the "Public Option". Any real reform with health care will never happen if we do not have a public option. If you want to give up everything we gained by getting rid of Bush do nothing. If you want to move Forward let Conrad know he has lost your support if he caves in to the hoopleheads.

Gofer caught in front yard using Hooplehead device

Yesterday Lord Kadizzle set out to capture a vicious gofer that set up residence near our front door. For 19.95 Lord Kadizzle bought the Kern's gofer begone device. The manufacture actually sent their sales representative to my house with the device. He arrived on a motorcycle with a helmet designed to make him look like a large gofer riding a motorcycle.

The factory rep gave me a brief run down on how the trap worked. You place the trap near the gofer hole. The trap is nothing but a piece of drain pipe with a sock on the end. Now the agent explained gofers are just like Hoopleheads, you can scare them into doing anything. He asked if I was a Republican politician. When I asked why, he said that in order to catch gofers you had to lie and be able to scare Hoopleheads.

The agent told me you set up a situation where the gofer would get scared and find it easier to run into the trap than get back to his hole. Lork Kadizzle began to see the scheme. It was just like bilking the Hooples.

So after the salesman left I put the trap out by the front door. When the gofer went out and toward the seeds I sprinkled near the trap, I rushed out the door and yelled "Obama is going to kill your grandmother". The gofer panicked just like a Hoopleheads and ran right into the trap. Now, I had him. Later I caught one by yelling "Obama will raise taxess".

The device is wonderful and comes with a recipe book. Now that Lord Kadizzle has used it he feels just like Rush Limbaugh or a Fox News anchor. Just make up anything yell it at the gofers and they are trapped when they run to the wrong hole.

70 Percent of southerns idiots, Lord Kadizzle may be one

The commander just read Lord Kadizzle some statistics from the news paper. Forty seven percent of southerners believe Obama was not born in the U.S. and thirty percent are not sure. That means seventy percent of southerners don't have a clue. Poor old Lord Kadizzle is from West Virginia, and that by some is considered the south. Kadizzle saw Obama's birth certificate printed in color in Newsweek, so Kadizzle is convincienced Obama is an American, but there is not shortage of idiots in the south who willo believe any urban legend. Now, lets all go out and kill some grannies just like the new health bill says we should.

Jihad Day Lord Kadizzle takes on the Back Crackers

Yesterday Blue Cross sent me an email with some information I requested. I am paying over ten dollars per month for coverage by Chiropractors. I hate Chiropractors, they are modern day witch doctors. They are the singe biggest fraud perpetrated on health care consumers. If you are willing to do your homework you will find the whole profession has no basis in science and there is not data to support what they claim. So today I started my Chiropractor jehad.

These scoundrel went to the ND legislature and had Chiropractic care mandated in all ND insurance policies. Of course the hoopleheads fell for it lock stock and barrell. Consumer Reports research indicates that Chiropractors and message therapist run neck and neck for results. The message therapist are honest. They just rub you and make you feel good. On the other hand the vodoo guys make all sorts of wierd claims and charge twice as much.

Quinn's Crack on Lake Sakakawea

Hoopleheads going to have another Tea Party

After the first great tea party was stirred up by Fox News the Hoopleheads are going to give it another try. If at first you don't succeed, try the stupid idea again. If there is one thing the Hoopleheads like, it is being scared. Hoopleheads are just like little children. They love to be frightened. Terrorist scare Hoopleheads, any change in our hopeless health care scares hoopleheads, and nothing scares them like a black president. It just isn't right. So the king of the hooples, good old Rush Limbaugh, you know the guy who got hooked on oxycontin supplied by his cleaning lady, likes to feed their racist fears. Of course he could not just outright say what he wants to stir up, but he knows the code words.

You can sell the Hoople anything. Who buys the crap Billy Mays used to sell? Yup, the Hoopleheads. The Hoopleheads bought the story lock, stock and barrell about Obama not being an American citizen. The Hooples still believe in the 100mpg carborator GM suppressed to help the oil companies. Urban legends are like fairy tales to the Hooples. When a moma Hoople puts her kids to sleep at night she tells the little Hooples about someone in Canada who had to wait for medical treatment.

Week Long Sail, in searh of Marsh Mellow Trees

For twenty years or more the Week Long Sail has been a tradition on the big lake. Tomorrow the Kadizzles will head west for a week. The Commander just reported north west winds for tomorrow. This will not be favorable. The dangers are many, storms, drunkenness, Indian attacks, rattlesnakes, and games of dare to be stupid. However, someone has to continue the search for a Northwest Passage. With the lake at its highest levels in years we may be able to find a trade route to Seattle.

A total of perhaps five ships will be in the fleet. If we can find a country with health care for everyone we will try to capture some of the natives and bring them back to explain how it works. Prior to the trip everyone must be immunized against socialism. There have already been outbreaks in the blue states. Should socialism spread everyone might have a chance to live like the rich and equality could spread everywhere, so it is important we stop it before rich people loose their second homes and private jets. With global warming the marshmellow trees are blooming early and we hope to pick some when we get far enough west.

Lake Sakakawea Paridise

The Amazing Hoopleheads

Lord Kadizzle was just spinning the channels and stopped to watch CNN. CNN showed the newspaper from the day Obama was born in Hawaii. There was a birth announcement for Obama printed in the paper. Of course we all know the hoopleheads have started an urban legend that Obama is not an American. How do the hoopleheads refute this evidence. People are finding papers with the annoucement. If this is fakery it is the most amazing ever. Fooling the hoopleheads is the simplest thing in the world. A hooplehead believes if a lot of people say something at the coffee shop it is true. The hoopleheads never go to a web site to check out the origin of an urban legend. Hoopleheads are like children they cling on to their fantasy. God bless the hoopleheads after all they are what make Republicans possible.

Death from Kindness or Pig on the Prarie recipe

Lord Kadizzle lives the charmed life when it comes to knowing good cooks. First and foremost is The Commander. The Commander could season puppy chow and make a gourmet meal out of it. Lord Kadizzle knows more good cooks than you can shake a stick at. Rarely do three days go by that some good cook doesn't invite the Kadizzles by. Yesterday was typical. Kadizzle went to the boat to perform some simple task, as simple people do, and the next thing he knew he was sitting in front of some wonder german potato salad, brauts freshly cooked on the grill and a fresh garden salad. The kindly boat neigbors turned the gab session into a grab session. Since we were eating aboard we even untied the kitchen from the dock and took a minor spin around the bay. When Lord Kadizzle dies from overeating he may not fit in a casket. The alternative will be to creamate him. It will be a blazing fire with all the fat. The smoke will smell like prime rib, turkey stuffing, and a host of other wonderful seasonings that have marinated him for over sixty years. Put the fire out a little early and let the coyotes have pig on the prarie.

Arial Pictures of Moose Bay

Donna King took this nice picture of Moose Bay with the sail boats from their plane

Juneberry Heaven

A couple years ago Lord Kadizzle ran for the North Dakota legislature. One of his main goals was to have legislation passed that some pies could not be served without vanilla ice cream. Unfortunately Kadizzle lost. Now pies are subjected to improper treatment. The most precious pie know to man is the Juneberry pie. God put a special blessing on North Dakota this year and Juneberries are plentiful. The Commander, A.K.A. Jasper Littlebottom loves to pick Juneberries. So there are some nice Juneberry pies in the future. The Juneberry pie is sacred, but an entry was recieved in the strawberry, rubarb catagory at Ray's that may win. One minor problem, for reasons of fairness, all entries must be duplicated. The theory is that anyone could accidently make a wonderful pie. To protect all entries in Lord Kadizzles baking contest entrants are required to submit two pies withing six months. However if no other entries are recieved in the same catagory you may still win. Being the judge of pie contest is a sacrifice. Few judges escape the occupational hazard of being overweight. Many are killed by obesiety just to provide society with this vital service. I hope Kadizzle's life will not be in vain, and pies will go untested. Pies cannot be entered with photos, as one mean brother in law frequently tries to do. Also hersey is not permitted. Lord Kadizzle must be present at the slicing and actually test the pie.

Old sidewinder misses young sidewinder

This morning Lord Kadizzle went for a hike during the sailing adventure. Be the brave soul he is he led the small group into the vast prairie wilderness. As a precaution his lordship always takes his hiking stick and checks for the rattlers in the path. However, this morning he somehow stepped right over one without noticing. The next hiker said "You almost stepped on a rattlesnake, there it goes". The rattler holed up under a rock and prepared to defend himself. It make you wonder how many you have stepped over and never even noticed.

Kate sends a letter from the Hills of Home

A West Virginia State trooper pulled a car over on I-77 about 2 miles from the West Virginia/Ohio state line.

When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver said he was a magician and juggler and was on his way to Zanesville, Ohio to do a show at the Shrine Circus. He didn't want to be late.

The trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling and asked if the driver would do a little juggling for him then he wouldn't give him a ticket.

He told the trooper he had sent his equipment ahead and didn't have anything to juggle. The trooper said he had some flares in the trunk and asked if he could juggle them. The juggler said he could, so the trooper got 5 flares, lit them and handed them to him.

While the man was juggling, a car pulled in behind the patrol car. A drunken good ole 'bubba' from Kentucky got out, watched the performance, then went over to the
patrol car, opened the rear door and got in.

The trooper observed him and went over to the patrol car, opened the door asking the drunk what he thought he was doing.

The drunk replied, "You might as well take my butt to jail cause there ain't no friggin' way I can pass that test."

Ozan and Mike at Berthold Bay

Lost Treasure in North Dakota

North Dakota has one of the most amazing unused resources imaginable. Lake Sakakawea spans over an enormous area right in the center of the state, but very few of the states 600,000 registered hoopleheads have ever been on it or realize how vast the lake is. If the state made even a moderate attempt to develope the tourism potential of the lake the economic impact could be vast. Between the states lack of imagination and to determination of the Corp of Engineers to suppress recreation, nothing ever happens to improve the lake facilities. The corp does everything it can to make any improvement difficult if not impossible. The state acts like the lake does not exist.

In a classic Corp State fiasco a new marina was built or should I say is still being built at Garrison. Garrison already had a five million dollar marina. Who would put two multimillion dollar marinias in one small town while there is not a single marina on the western three quarters of the lake? Brain dead is the only explanation. Ten million dollars in one place when three million in three places could have done wonders. For larger boats there are no facilites for over one hundred fifty miles of the lake. The amazing ineptitude of the state combined with the obstinance of the corp has assurred this lake will never reach it's potential. However, this may be just fine for a lot of people that enjoy the solitude, and I may just count myself one of them.

Jasper Littlebottom up early and at em

Our gardener Jasper Littlebottom shot out of the house like a rocket today and started raking under the pine trees and trimming. Not even eight O clock and the pickup has a load of pine needles. Now Littlebottom wants Kadizzle to get his bottom in gear and dump the mess. Littlebottom has been diagnosed with hyperactivity. Hyperactivity has it's pros and cons. Thank god Littlebottom is going to the dentist so Kadizzle can rest a little.

Contributing Editor sends wonderful gravity music

Lord Kadizzle the direct decendant of a wet lump.

On Facebook my sister Kathleen wrote the following about my father. "Corey's photo of backyard camping reminded me of when Daddy was sleeping with us in the pup tent in our back yard as kids and we all got up and went inside because of his snoring and then it rained and the tent fell down on him and that didn't wake him. The next morning I remember looking out the window at this lump in the yard...a wet lump.

For years I have wondered where the lump above my belt, and below my chin came from. It never occurred to me many of my kin have the same lump. Now, I realize we are all direct decedents of a wet lump. Not long ago Lord Kadizzle went to the doctor. The Commander always complained that Lord Kadizzle was too fat. So at the doctors office Kadizzle asked the doctor if he was too fat. No, the doctor replied, you have lumpadiglyitis. Lumpadiglyitis causes a severe swelling around the waste. It turns out lumpadiglyitis is a genentic trait aquired by decendents of wet lumps.

Fire at rumor mill, hoopleheads speechless

A couple days ago the local coffee shop had a fire. The place had to close for a few days. Hoopleheads get most of their news and stories second hand. For local myths, legends, and just plain lies the coffee shop is very important. The people who firmly believe Barrack Obama does not have a birth certificate get assurance at the coffee shop that he is a terrorist.

So when the hoopleheads could not get confused at the coffee shop they all had to sit home and rely on Fox News to scare them and keep their heads spinning with falshoods. Joy has returned to Hazen and the coffee shop is open.

Now for an example of how hooplehead knowledge works. About a week ago a tornado was spotted near Beulah. Some local dinger set off the warning system in Beulah. However, the dinger did not do it correctly and he managed to set off the alarms in Hazen, and Stanton in addition to the alarm in Beulah. Well immediately the hoopleheads used reverse hooplehead thinking to conclude that if there was an alarm, there was a tornado. Even though the sky are clear, and all evidence points to no tornado, coffee shop wisdom says there was one. The basic principle of coffee shop truth is that if a lot of people believe something it is true. Sometimes the definition of a lot of people is everyone sitting at your table at the rumor mill.

Usually the morning starts out at the coffee shop with a big hooplehad swaggering in and pulling up a chair. The hoople regurgitates something scary Fox News made up the night before, so the hoople says, " Did you hear about Obama grinding up all the shell casings so we cannot get ammunition?". Without any thought the game is on and the hooples are going wild. No hooplead ever goes to an urban legend site to check out anything.

Did you ever wonder who buys all the Amish heaters you see advertised or the other stuff Billy May sell's. Yup it is the hooples. When you go in a hooplehead home and see the Edin Pure magical heater right beside the lounge chair you know you are dealing with a hooplehead. Hazen has so many hoopleheads the Edin Pure Heater man came every week. The salesman convinced the hooples that he could get two gallons out of a one gallon container. No problem. The hooples really love the heat you get from blowing air over two light bulbs hidden in a box. For a couple hundred bucks you could get one.

Gravity Waves everywhere

Few things are worse than unexpectedly getting hit by a gravity wave. Lord Kadizzle has a lot of experience and tips for those who may be struck. If the wave appears to be mild don't panic. For example: If you are doing a few dishes and a gravity wave starts to hit you, slowly move toward the den and sit down in front of the TV until the wave passes. This may take a news show, sometimes two. Once the wave has passed move back to the kitchen. As you get near the sink if you don't feel anything abnormal, go ahead and finish the dishes.

Now for the medium gravity wave, what do you do? Suppose you have been putzing about the yard and begin to feel heavier than normal. This is going to require a snore nap. Again this can be handled in the sitting position with the TV on or off. The important thing is to recline so the wave can be evenly distributed over your body, otherwise you might get crushed. A snore nap usually takes about fifteen minutes of hard snoring to break up the gravity. Remember to get up slowly.

Next we are going to discuss the massive gravity wave. To survive this you must completely lie down in a soft bed. Gravity is effected by sunlight, so normally one is safe until the sun starts to set, but don't be surprized if you are hit by a wave as early as 7:30. Once you feel a wave starting don't panic. Move slowly toward the bed. Sometimes the wave will pass in an hour or two and you can get up and safely watch TV or read. However, many waves will last all night and the best thing to do is remain prone until you feel completely safe.

What if you are at work and get hit by a wave? Quickly put your feet up on the desk. Be very careful that your chair does not go out from under you. I know several people who were almost killed in this fashion.

Don't take gravity lightly, it can strike anytime and anywhere. The key is to be proactive. At the first signs you are getting heavier get to the nearest couch and lay down. Kadizzle has survived some serious gravity wave which now seem to be more frequent with advanced age. Remember, don't let gravity get you down.

War has broken out in Hazen

As the morning coffee brewed Kadizzle thought someone was landing a jet at the Hazen international airport. It is a wonderful airport for a city our size. It cost about five million, and gets used so little we have drag races on the runway. Soon Kadizzle kept hearing the same jet landing over and over. No its not a jet landing, but a crop sprayer bombing weeds about a half mile away. The sound is like an old World War Two movie, when they make the straiffing runs. Perhaps I should run out with my pheasant gun and take a shot. I would say we are being bombed by the Germans, but we are the Germans. Hazen is about 90 percent German heritage.

Hazen does have it's own airforce. Colonel Klink as I call him is the commander. Klink patrols the skys over Hazen with a motorized parachute. One day I asked Klink if he ever practiced making emergency landings with our only weapon of defense. Klink replied " Why would you practice something you had to get right the first time?". Our town is fortunate to have several idiot sevants. We also have a good supply of just plane idiots. We are running low on bums.

The other day I encountered three of our best bums having a little conference. We discusssed the bum shortage, and Kadizzle learned one of the three was seeking work. If we get down to two bums Hazen has decided to advertize. If you don't have a good core of bums to hang around with each other their population is hard to sustain. They seemed to get so bored they go to work. I am afraid that is why we lost so many this summer. Most of our bums are leftover highshool kids that went to college for three months and could not take the rigor of getting up in the morning. They return to Hazen and live in their parents basements. They can take a lot of boredom and work scares them, but as I said you need a breeding population.

The Garden in Full Glory

Ozan, Lord Kadizzle and the Commander survive

Its been many years since his Lordship played a good round of dare to be stupid, but last night was a fine session. The key to a good round of dare to be stupid is starting with a bad situation. That way you can make it worse.

So in already high winds we headed west. With no more than a storm jib the boat was moving down the lake like a bullet. Kadizzle was luckily stopped by the crew from putting up the mainsail. As a cold front bore in from the west the boat was on a reach at over hull speed headed right into a terrible storm. To make it better we were trolling for lightening. To the southwest lighting was striking and of course we were headed right toward it.

The crew had little faith in the captain and insisted he did not know where Whitmeyer bay was. However, the captain turned out to be correct and the boat made it into the bay. As everyone was settled with the boat on anchor things seemed ok. The storm had a different idea. All of a sudden an already high wind increased to seventy or eighty mph. As Ozan tried to help with the Anchor his glasses were blown off by the wind. The boat came loose and the normal Chinese fire drill ensued. We survived by driving the boat onto the shore and pinning it down with trailer anchors. The video above was the ride back the next day. The boat set a new speed record of 9.2 knots. Amazingly this was done with only the storm jib. The smallest amount of sail the Sovereign can carry.

Far easier to talk to God, but Kadizzle has revenge for Verizon

A lot of frustration ensued today trying to reset our password on the Verizon system. Weaving my way back and forth fighting computer phone systems and people who sent me back to computer phone systems just about drove me over the brink. Why can't they have the first option be " Would a human being be able to solve your problem easier" press one. I think the next time I talk to human on a computer phone system and they ask me a question I will say "press one to say yes, or press two to say no". I will make them answer all my questions with key strokes.

Johny Appleseed removes Apple Tree

Summer in the land of Kadizzle is quite pleasant lately. Everything is exceptionally green. Today's big project was removing the stump from the apple tree. Apple trees are very tenacious. Lord Kadizzles technique is slow, but as they say Rome was not built in a day. My tool is a six ton hydraulic jack. For a tree its size I have seen few trees put up such a fight. The process took several hours in the hottest day in a long time.

One never knows how many pies were left in that tree. It is sort of like sending a car to the junkyard with gas in the tank. Mowing will be easier. With the bad economy we put a couple of twenty dollar bills in the hole in hopes that a money tree will sprout.

2009 Summer Sailstice Photo Gallery - Photo 1 of 14 by Rick - MySpace Photos

2009 Summer Sailstice Photo Gallery - Photo 1 of 14 by Rick - MySpace Photos

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The fleet back in Berthhold Bay

Everyone had a great sail and a great evening back in Berthold Bay. It was the first time in eight years we could get into the old traditional spot. Swam, had a camp fire the whole nine yards. Mrs. Kadizzle A.K. A. The Commander stayed home and gardened, but David Mack and two year old Audrey along with her mom Amanda made the trip. Audrey was a good sailor. Good sail home on Sunday. This Saturday the fleet will gather there again to celebrate Summer Sailstice. Anyone who can get there is welcome by land or sea. The more the merryer.

The staggers and jags

Yesterday Lord Kadizzle and a friend who has requested to remain anonymous launched one more boat for a friend. As a reward the friend gave us a bottle of gin. Not a good idea. After the launch we settled on the deck of the Sovereign for a little social with the neighboring house boat. It was a pleasant sunny day with good conversation. However when we left the spirits were gone, and perhaps we were a little over served as they say. We had the staggers and jags. Stan Rogers in one of my favorite songs Barrette's Privateers mentions the staggers and jags.

" The Antelope sloop was a sickening sight,
HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW!
She'd a list to the port and and her sails in rags
And the cook in scuppers with the staggers and the jags

	Twitching, loss of balance and motor skills, and hallucinations caused by intense alcohol abuse; technical term is delirium tremens. 1. "And the cooks cleaned the kitchen with the staggers and the jags." -- Gillian Welch & David Rawlings 2. The barfly barely made it to the restroom through the staggers and jags.

Definition of "the staggers and jags"

The Amazing Hoopleheads vote against Air

Lord Kadizzle lives in a state dominated by hoopleheads both on the state and local level. The hoopleheads philosophy is when in doubt just vote or say no. Yesterday the hooples in our town voted against having natural gas in our town. Even though every hoople could save five hundred dollars per year in heating cost the hooples voted it down. How can this be? Hooples don't get information like you and I might. The hooples get most of their information at the bar or the coffee shop. Urban legends, rumors, and myths flourish with drunks and old geezers having coffee. The fundamental thing of a hoople is that "If it is different it must be bad". Hooples like their meat burnt, they don't like seasoning, and any word that has more than six letters is probably a conspiracy. On the state level the hooples just removed any requirements for teaching your children at home. This will insure a fresh supply of hooples. However, the hooples upped the requirement for message therapist and now require both licensing and additional training. You can be dumb as hell in North Dakota, but a least you will get a good back rub. Any Questions.

There Must be a God

Merrily Lord Kadizzle has been cutting the grass for the last hour. The Bible says "Two sparrows are sold for a penny, aren't they? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground without your Father's permission. . It was not a sparrow, but a young Robin. Paying little attention I was going about my grass cutting when for some reason I happened to look down. Instantly I stopped three inches from a young robin that must have just left the nest. Three inches and that poor fellow would have known the feeling of going through a jet engine like the birds on the Hudson did when they brought down the Airbus.

The fact that at the last instant I managed to see the bird felt like the intervention of the divine. Unfortunately God must have been watching TV yesterday. I pushed the mower under the neighbors cedar tree and bird parts flew everywhere. My assumption was I had hit the carcass of a bird killed by cats. However, today I am haunted that I may have hit the sibling of the fellow saved today. The moral of the story is God acts in strange ways.

Wood Ducks March to creek at Kadizzle's

The neighbors in our area have gone to great lengths to raise Wood Ducks. So every spring about fifty new ducks get hatched. Both neighbors have cameras in the wood duck houses so they can see the entire process

Myan Calander still in use in Mercer County.

At the fine Marina where I store my boat one signs a contract that requires Lord Kadizzle to have his boat out of the storage lot by May 15. Due to the fact the the docks where I keep my boat were not ready my boat could not go in the water until June 8th. The owner of the storage lot, and marina where my boat is stored explained to me there are two months between May 15, and June 3, the date I put my boat in the water. So instead of paying one month's late fee the man of infinite integrity with a cross in his front yard wants me to pay him for the Mayan month of Cashaflowa which runs from May 15 to the end of May, and the Julian Calander of June, which in his infinite Christian magnanamous way he refuses to prorate. Perhaps I was wrong about the cross in his yard and it was a left over remnant from a Klan barbeque.

Grandpa Ticklepinch

Old Grandpa Ticklepinch got his boat in the water yesterday. Took a brief sail to the other side of the lake. Summer has finally dawned in the great northwest.