Sunday, July 15, 2018

Senile Sailing.

Sailing alone in good weather is a bit of a task, but going alone in a big blow can get you in trouble.  As long as Kadizzle has sailed he has still not developed any good habits.  A good sailor does things in and orderly fashion.  The hell with that.  Put the sail up and lets go.  Kaddizzle and Stroupini each sailed their boat down the lake to spend the night.  After a pleasant supper, some nice squeeze box music by Stroupini and a visit from an old friend the sailors settled down for a good sleep.  Kadizzle was awakened by Stoupini with coffee.

As predicted the wind came up big time.  Now it was time for the first senile moment.  After cooking the egg sandwiches Kadizzle decided to put some water in the frying pan and heat the water to make cleaning the pan easier. Somehow attention got diverted and the boats pulled anchor with the pan cooking on the stove.  With luck Kadizzle smelled something and went below.  This was just before he was about to set sail and heel the boat over big time.  The frying pan was plenty hot and the spatula in the pan was melted in several places.  Pan and all went in the lake.  Had that hot pan slid from the stove onto the floor it would have surely burnt some nice stains.  That was senile moment one.  On the last sail Kadizzle forgot the coffee pot was not stowed and it fell overboard.  It broke the top in the process but it was fished out of the lake successfully.  On the way into the marina Kadizzle notice a line dragging along the boat as it plowed ahead full speed.  The line for the running back stay somehow had found its way into the water.  It would have surely fouled the prop coming into the marina. Not a good thing in a big wind.  Finally back at the marina Kadizzle wondered if anyone would pop out to help him land at the slip. It was not a cross wind landing so it was not hard, but Conner the fourth grader appeared to help.  Conner and Kadizzle got the ship tied up.

Friday, July 13, 2018

Make something Happen

Some people swim, and some people let the current push them.  In life you meet those who let the current push them when with just a little effort they could swim to a more pleasant place.  Once Kadizzle heard a stump preacher say " Don't ever ask God for anything, take it".  The same preacher said " Do you realize that when you kneel down to pray you are in a perfect position to be kicked in the ass?".  There is some wisdom in all this.  In life you either make something happen or you let it happen.  The huge wheel on my good ship suffered a broken spoke. The wheel is made from stainless steel and the broken wheel needed the aid of a good welder.  Kadizzle went to the welding shop in town and was told it would be weeks before the wheel could be fixed.  Driving down the street the next day Kadizzle saw a pipeline welders truck sitting in front of his home.  Now if you can weld on a pipeline you are probably a pretty good welder.  Kadizzle knocked on the door and the nice young welder said sure he could fix the wheel.  So here we are a few days later and the wheel is fixed. Welding the wheel without leaving burn marks was not easy, but the welder did a great job, and Kadizzle is over joyed.

Now what is the point of this story?  Kadizzle believes so much can be accomplished by simply asking. The other day Kadizzle and Binki wanted to stay in a nice hotel, but we did not want to pay too much to do it.  What is the solution?  Ask to pay less.  After asking and negotiating we got a lower price and they gave us a suite rather than the typical room. The problem is most people are afraid to ask.  Somehow they think it is embarrassing to ask for a better deal.  Turn the table on this thought process.  The guy selling you the car is not embarrassed to ask too much for the car, he is not embarrassed to sell you extra crap you don't need.  So why should you be embarrassed to ask for a discount?

The people who get kicked around are the people that lay down.  Like that preacher said kneel down bend over and you can expect to get kicked. 

There is one moral thing about asking. When you ask the world for something think how you can give the world something.  Back to the boat wheel.  Kadizzle paid the welder well for fixing the wheel, but Kadizzle also invited the welder to go for a nice sail on the boat.  So the welder may in the end come out with more than he expected.  Once someone does you a good deed you should try your best to pay them back.  Many times when a clerk or waitress does something nice for you a simple way to do a good deed is to remark to the manager what a good job the person did.  You can always write a thank you or you can speak well of the business.  On the big lake there used to be two terrible marina managers.  Farther down the lake at Indian Hills the people were as nice as could be.  Kadizzle always made it a point to speak highly of them. The old saying, " What goes around comes around?"  has a lot of truth.  So try to do good deeds.  The pay it forward thing works.  Kadizzle cannot think of how many times a stranger has got him out of a bind. 

Kadizzle and Jasper Little bottom have always invited bicycling and kayaking strangers into our home.  We met some great people and made some good friends.   Once when Kadizzle was gathering up some strays bicycling a fried said I could never do that.  Kadizzle asked the person whey they could not assist a stranger by inviting them home to sleep and shower.  The friend said you might get robbed or murdered.  Now how many people are riding a bike across country just looking for a chance to rob or murder someone?  When you live in that world of fear you miss so much and you have put yourself in jail.  Go forth a prosper. Be nice, and enjoy what time you have.  You never know when the battery will go dead.

Thursday, July 12, 2018

It rained gravity

Kadizzle came back from MN and got on the scale. Apparently gravity rained all over him while on his jaunt to Duluth.  To counteract the gravity Kadizzle went with Jasper Littlebottom to Harmon Lake.  Nine miles around the lake Kadizzle went.  A couple of the gravity pellets came off, but still many remain.  Harmon lake is a great example of what can be done in North Dakota with some imagination.  The lake is a well done project and the combination  bike and hike trail is excellent.  The trail part is fascinating because it shows what can be done inexpensively in North Dakota to build trails.  North Dakota should have a trail along the river from the dam to Bismarck.  There should be trails along Lake Sakakawea. Trails are not that expensive or hard to make, but the old goat farmers in North Dakota would rather have a fiberglass cow or some other effigy to silliness.  You cannot lose weight looking at a fiberglass cow, or starring at a tractor museum, but pedaling the bike gets the chicken meat off.  North Dakota needs to stop the flow of money out of state to oil companies and keep some home to improve the state.  Until we rid ourselves of the Republican curse we will have nothing to do but stare at fiberglass fish, cows, and buffalo.

Wednesday, July 11, 2018

Howling like a Wolf

Binki and Kadizzle started yesterday by visiting the Corp of Engineers museum in Duluth.  As we were leaving the museum Kadizzle heard this blood curdling howl.  The acoustics of the place made it even more emphasized.  The first thought was it was some child.  Going out the door Kadizzle realized it was a person with a mental disability.  Kadizzle remarked to Binki he had never heard such a reaction from a mentally disabled person.  Binki explained it was common with the people who lived in a home near him.  The remarkable resemblance to a wild animal was striking.

So soon we were on our way west again.  Back to Walker MN to meet Stroupini.  Last nights meal was again more than we should have eaten, but we are on vacation was the excuse.  Now a peculiar thing happened. The eating establishment could not process our credit card because of some national computer glitch.  The waitress suggested we use the ATM machine to get some cash.  After we became impatient for the fix of the glitch Kadizzle gave in and went to the machine.  The worn debit card that is never used did not work in the machine.  A nearby lady said why don't I just give you the money you need.  Our bill was almost $100 and we needed about $60.  Kadizzle explained to the lady he had no way to pay her back.  She said that was OK and insisted on helping.  It seemed like an extreme case of generosity.  Kadizzle could not take the ladies money and we finally had to use Binki's card.

Sitting here at the hotel waiting for Binki to awaken Kadizzle is eating a muffin.  Now Honest Omar if you are reading today's report you were part of the situation yesterday.  As Kadizzle pulled up to the hotel on his return from the casino he noticed a Honda motorcycle.  Cannot remember the model, but it is the one you are trying to sell Omar.  Kadizzle asked the guy with the Honda if he knew of anyone who wanted to buy one similar. Which would be yours Omar.  The stranger said he recognized Kadizzle.   Kadizzle explained it was unlikely the stranger knew Kadizzle because Kadizzle was from North Dakota.  The guy insisted he knew Kadizzle.   After some sorting out it turned out he did.  The man must have had a good memory.  Over twenty years ago the fellow had done some repair work at the mine where Kadizzle worked.  Indeed we had met in the past.  Sorry Omar, but I could not find a buyer.

Today will be a long car ride slug back to North Dakota.  If Kadizzle can make it in time the good neighbor is going to cook him steak.  The neighbor cooks the best steak ever.  Somehow he marinates it in beer.  That is one secret.  The other is he owns a grocery store.  That means the meat he gets is cut just for him. The last thing Kadizzle needs is one more big meal, but will power is scarce when Little Joey is involved.  Little Joey can be controlled the first part of the day, but around four he goes wild.

Back to the casino.  Kadizzle thinks gambling is one of the worst curses put on our country.  It is appropriate that most of the gamble done now is on Indian reservations.  It gives the native Americans a chance for revenge on the foolish white man.  Sometime back Kadizzle was taught by a casino employee how to cash out the free playing points you get when you join the casino club.  Most casinos will give you $20 of free play to join.  Kadizzle never spends his own money, but with nothing to do always gets the $20.  One they give you the free play you cash out every time you win on the slot machine.  Traveling with two people this usually means you can recoup about forty dollars.  So at the casino Binki and Kadizzle managed to bring back about twenty dollars.  It was less than the usual, but it did pay for some drinks, and is a fool proof way to get back at the evil gambling joints.  In New Mexico Littlebottom and Kadizzle managed to get two free nights in the RV area from a casino with this technique.

Now for just a little rant.  A day does not go by that Trump does not out do himself for stupidity.  Pardoning the Bundy gang that took over a national park sets a new low for Trump if that is possible.  The man loves to play to the Hoopleheads.  The news today is Trump insulting NATO and his secret meeting with Putin.  November must bring relief.

Tuesday, July 10, 2018

Have You Found Jesus?

Binki and Kadizzle made it to Duluth after we dropped off Stroupini in Walker MN.  Never been to Duluth before so thought Kadizzle would give it a spin.  So here we are sitting in our nice little suite.  Ah, some good coffee to start the day.  First we went to an Irish Pub to wet our whistle.  Then the search for a good eating place.  We ended up at Pickwicks.  The prices helped finance the national debt. Kadizzle made a big mistake and got the firebelly ribs.  All night the stomach boiled with firebelly.  Kadizzle never gets any smarter.  See all the pretty summer girls is a treat.  After supper we walked toward the lakeshore boardwalk.  Sitting in front of some bar was a younger woman with holes drilled in her head everywhere so she could put all sorts of pierced rings and bobbles on her face.  Of course her hair was dyed purple with cool aid.  Approaching the woman Kadizzle asked " Have  you found Jesus?".    She answered " Yes, he was behind the couch".   She went on to say sometimes he was is the closet and elsewhere.  It seemed like such a good answer.  Think about it when they come to your door and ask if you found Jesus, they never ask where.  With so many people looking for Jesus it would seem useful to know where he hides.

Next we settled in for an after dinner drink at a nice little place by the lake.  Some ranting lunatic kept harassing the customers.  The owner chased him off once, but he came back.  The owner called the gendarmes and they showed up in force.  We did not get to see the capture, but it would have been fun.  Today we have to entertain ourselves in Duluth then go back to get Stroupini tomorrow.  Stroupini is at some sort of banking meeting since he owns numerous banks.  On the way over Stroupini offered to buy Kadizzle an electric bicycle he has been coveting.  Apparently in some kind of haze Stroupini ordered the thing.  If it shows up on the doorstep Kadizzle will be grateful.  A friend in need is a friend in deed, and a friend with a few banks isn't bad either. 

Binki is in the other room sleeping away.  Old Binki has been looking for a job that does not involve work for some time.  It became too strenuous so now he has canceled the search.  If he finds such work perhaps Kadizzle could sign on.  Crooked preaching is the best way to go. No inventory, set your own hours, and you get a private jet.

Monday, July 09, 2018

June Berry Pie

The mother of all pies is the June Berry pie.  Yesterday Jasper Littlebottom baked two of the precious pies.  Kadizzle just polished off two pieces of pie for breakfast.  Kadizzle once ran for the North Dakota legislature.  His only goal was to pass legislation requiring all pies to be served with ice cream.  Sadly he did not get elected, but eating a June Berry Pie without ice cream is still considered an offense in our home.

Today three members of the Crazy Club will head to Walker MN.   Stroupini who owns more banks than Jesus has to go to some sort of bank meeting.  Binki and Kadizzle will go on to Duluth MN.  At 9 we take off.  Shiny has been running a rummage sale in her garage.  So far after four days we have made three dollars.  The streets in Hazen are torn up and no one can get to the garage.

NPR is playing in the background.  The topic is the cave disaster with the boys.  Boys trapped in a cave, while the Republicans are trapped in a mental cave.  Republicans have no clue they are mesmerized by stupidity.  Trump is far an away the most insane person ever to hold such a high office in our country.  The amazing thing is people's inability to recognize he is absolutely crazy.  A few days back in Montana Trump gave an incoherent speech.  His minions did not notice. They just clapped and waved their red hats in approval.

Maybe you listened to NPR yesterday or perhaps the day before.  A woman who had been editor of the New Yorker spoke about how Trump poured wine down the back of a woman he was angry with for writing a negative article about him.  This took place at a formal dinner party before he was president.  The man is totally insane, yet Republicans will make up any excuse to believe he is normal.

Sunday, July 08, 2018

The Ghost Ship

The sail west took Kadizzle first to Berthold Bay, then to Moose Bay.  At Berthold Kadizzle took a couple swims then got bored.  Heading East Kadizzle ran into the ship named Ghost.  On that ship were two liberals infected as badly as Kadizzle.  The ships tied up together in Moose Bay and had a liberal love fest.  With a few rounds of drinks the laughing and story telling ensued.   In the morning all awoke and the pancakes flew out of the pan.  Winds were light on the way back but it was another good encounter with old friends on the lake. 

Time is flying by so fast.  Kids are growing like weeds.  People you remember as little kids now tell you they are fifty.  It makes you feel like you are one hundred when you see every kid now taller than their mom and dad.

Occasionally Kadizzle gives reading recommendations.  If you can get your hands on the latest issue of The New Yorker read the humor column  about St. Don.   Of course it is about the most insane man ever to hold public office.  If you actually read the things Trump says you cannot help but realize the man is totally crazy.  Recently he was in Montana and gave an incoherent speech.  His minions just cheered and thought it was wonderful.  As a country we have reached a level of national insanity that is beyond comprehension.  Trump is the leader of a cult.  No matter what he says or does his cultist just yell in support.  It is beyond belief.  Trump appoints people to jobs they don't even know how to pronounce.  Trump puts foxes in charge of chicken coops and his minions just cheer.  Like Bill Mahr said every minute you wonder what new idiocy Trump will cook up.  The Hoopleheads love the Trump circus.  Who cares if he destroys the planet, starts a war, or robs you blind it is just fun watching him burn the house down.