Met Jesus on a motorcycle, had Mary along

Lord Kadizzle has wanted to confront the local preachers about health care for everyone. Yesterday as Kadizzle filled the truck with gas he noticed a local preacher on his Harley, on the back was his wife. Realizing this was the equivalent of Joseph taking Mary to the manger I confronted the preacher to get his views. Kadizzled explained to the preacher his disappointment that none of the preachers had the balls to speak up about health care. Apparently preachers don't have balls, they believe in virgin birth. Next, the conversation evolved into what the preacher did believe. When Kadizzle mentioned Rush, and all the other right wing liars, the preacher said he listened to and believed them all. We were off to the races. Mary piped up about how the main goal was to prevent socialism, not help each other. The important thing was freedom. Mary wanted a country where you were free to be as dumb as you want, and spread it. Mary asked Kadizzle "Do you have a personal relationship with Jeeeesus?". Kadizzle explained he had a personal relationship with The Commander, and the Commander was pretty particular about who else he could have these relationships with". Men in flowing robes and sandels were questionable. After Kadizzle explained to the Biblical Harley saints that the fire department was socialist, the police were socialist, and the Medicare they were getting was socialist. Mary said Medicare was alright because they paid for it. Apparently in socialist countries they don't pay for anything, even what the government provided. After talking to the preacher motorcycle gang it became apparent Jeesus was more worried about taxes than health care.

When Kadizzle went in the gas station to buy his diet coke, he stood at the head shaking his head in disbelief about what a redneck preacher he had just met. The clerk said is something wrong. Kadizzle explained he just found out Jeeesus was against health care for everyone. Mary told him it was up to Christians to take care of each other, "but it doesn't work" she said. So until we get Jeeesus on our side things look pretty dim in Hazen.