As the morning coffee brewed Kadizzle thought someone was landing a jet at the Hazen international airport. It is a wonderful airport for a city our size. It cost about five million, and gets used so little we have drag races on the runway. Soon Kadizzle kept hearing the same jet landing over and over. No its not a jet landing, but a crop sprayer bombing weeds about a half mile away. The sound is like an old World War Two movie, when they make the straiffing runs. Perhaps I should run out with my pheasant gun and take a shot. I would say we are being bombed by the Germans, but we are the Germans. Hazen is about 90 percent German heritage.
Hazen does have it's own airforce. Colonel Klink as I call him is the commander. Klink patrols the skys over Hazen with a motorized parachute. One day I asked Klink if he ever practiced making emergency landings with our only weapon of defense. Klink replied " Why would you practice something you had to get right the first time?". Our town is fortunate to have several idiot sevants. We also have a good supply of just plane idiots. We are running low on bums.
The other day I encountered three of our best bums having a little conference. We discusssed the bum shortage, and Kadizzle learned one of the three was seeking work. If we get down to two bums Hazen has decided to advertize. If you don't have a good core of bums to hang around with each other their population is hard to sustain. They seemed to get so bored they go to work. I am afraid that is why we lost so many this summer. Most of our bums are leftover highshool kids that went to college for three months and could not take the rigor of getting up in the morning. They return to Hazen and live in their parents basements. They can take a lot of boredom and work scares them, but as I said you need a breeding population.
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