Waddling Lumpers

Two nights, two parties, lots of food, good food.  The waddling lumpers bellied up to the food bonanza.  Now, full disclosure, Kadizzle is a waddling lumper.  Go anywhere in this country and the lumpers are everywhere.  A nation with so much food we dispense it every few hundred feet.  The lumpers can always reach down and get some food.  Then of course food trucks chase the lumpers around and feed them.  Is it the lumpers fault, of course not.

Good lumpers do not walk, they take the car to the grocery store and bring back the food.  The really professional lumpers cook the food, and then post  a picture of the meal on facebook.  This of course makes all the other lumpers hungry.  Now a good lumper is two ax handles across the ass and will dress out at 250lbs.

The opioid addiction is a problem, but pales in comparison to the sugar addiction. Kadizzle has a good old friend who is a lumper and has been trying to commit food suicide for years. In his recliner he sits with one hand on the remote control. On his belly is usually a plate with some concoction.  A flea or a bed bug would have to pack a meal for a week just to go from one side of his enormous fatulance to the other.  The poor guy cannot walk over twenty five feet without becoming exhausted.  If he does walk the twenty five feet he goes out on the porch to smoke a cigarette.  His heart should be a coveted piece of meat for any scientist. How his heart has managed to pump blood through a four hundred fifty pound body being deprived of oxygen for so many years is in the realm of magic.

Of course Kadizzle does not want to be a lumper, but there are voices in the refrigerator of cold goodies crying out to be in a warm belly.  Noises come from the cupboard, sad cookies lonely and wanting company.  Listen closely and the cookies say " You can eat just one, just one will not hurt".  One becomes two and soon the whole box has disappeared.

Sometimes getting fat is an economic necessity. Kadizzle got the mail yesterday.  A food devil sent a coupon that entitled Kadizzle to get a free six inch Subway sandwich if he just bought a big drink of sugar juice.  It was a bargain.  The silly coupon said you had to text message Subway to get the prize.  Kadizzle did as instructed, and low and behold the coupons appeared on the phone.  What? There was a timer on the coupon. Kadizzle had four minutes to rush to Subway and get fat.  What a blessing Kadizzle lives almost next door to the Subway.  After jumping in the car Kadizzle rushed over.  In a panic the Subway lady emptying the garbage outside assured Kadizzle he could get the bargain gut bomb.  All turned out well.  Sitting blissfully eating the healthy sandwich Kadizzle thought about how he could restrain himself the rest of the day.  Of course it was all a lie.  One more lumper waddled out to the car and went about his search for will power.

Seeing a human

Last nigh Kadizzle attended a celebration for a friend.  In advance Kadizzle knew there would be a man there that had written a public condemnation of Kadizzle and his politics. Kadizzle was not looking forward to the close encounter. In fact Kadizzle was going to end up in a crowd of people that was about 95% composed of people who disagreed with his fundamental political beliefs.  To be a black man at a Klan rally was the feeling.

The letter fellow kindly engaged Kadizzle in a conversation, and we both got a chance to see each other as humans that lived lives, lost loved ones, and had some common beliefs.  It turned out we were both talkers.  So each of us now, knows that there is more good in the other than we suspected. The whole thing makes Kadizzle think of how fractured out society has become.  We have divided into clans, tribes, and fortresses.

Simply talking is therapeutic. Look how many situations have been defused simply by creating a new understanding of the other person. Can you get smarter as you get older? It seems like a real possibility. Some people never seem to get old enough to get any smarter, but hopefully life and history will eventually teach us all a better way.

New Body

The other day Kadizzle wandered over to see how the neighbor was doing, and check the level in the neighbors cookie jar. Neighbor said he was doing well but would be happy to get his new body.  In heaven you will be issued a new body.  Imagine a body like you had when you were 25, not a body that is pretty worn down by almost 70 years.  No more reading glasses, no more walking stick in the woods, no more feet that hurt, back that is sore, and new spots showing up everywhere.

Will they issue a new brain? Will the new brain have patience? Will the new brain behave better than the old one?  How about a new mouth that does not talk so much and say the wrong things?

In heaven there will be a lot fewer excuses.  No more " I am tired" or confused, or sore, or don't have the energy.

So as we go forward we wait for the clock to be turned back.

Hidden Treasure

Click on the picture to enlarge.  Six mornings waking up in a land like this. North Dakota has some incredible places, but few know of them or use them. Instead we promote fiberglass cows, fish, and the things you can find anywhere.

My ship came in.

After six days on the lake my ship came in.  To start the day old Kadizzled dropped his reading glassed in the lake.  Early in the cool morning Kadizzle stripped down and dove with googles into the water.  What a victory on the first dive Kadizzle had the glasses. With little thought the glasses were plopped on the bow of the boat.  Mrs Kadizzle immediately notices a lens was gone and the frame was broken. The sweet victory was short lived.  A good wind carried us back to the dock.

Home in the little berg Kadizzle checked the retirement fund.  The Trump bump brought the other ship in on Wall street.  How can a country have the most incompetent, insane president ever and still have a booming stock market? We love delusions, but the money still spends.

Fall on the lake is always nice. The sail was over one hundred eighty miles and we never used the mainsail. With the Jib alone we covered the ground.  The cooks made every meal a delight and the two old men enjoyed the booze, and the culinary delights.

Give him a chance

Imagine hiring a person to work for you.  Every day your employee comes to work and lies to you. He advocates grabbing the women in the office by the crotch. When he is supposed to be working he is often golfing. Your employee has bankrupted several of his own businesses, yet he tells you he will make your company great. You find out he got the job by lying on his application. Now you wonder if you should fire him, but all the people he gives free donuts say, give him a chance.  You feel like you have given him a chance, but he has insulted just about everyone in the office.  A lot of your good people have quit because they are embarrassed to work with him and cover up his lies.  Yet the donut eaters keep telling you, give him a chance.  So far after many months the new guy has accomplished nothing.  He promised so much. He said he would get the parking lot paved and have the company next door pay for it. On it goes things don’t get any better, yet you feel you should just give him a chance. The other companies that used to rely on you and your service are beginning to wonder what kind of businessman you are.  The image your new employee creates is hurting your product, but you have a hard time admitting you made a big mistake, so give him a chance.

Sitting in the garage

As on many days Kadizzle set out to make the rounds.  Shiny is on vacation, Stroupini is watching Shiny's dog.  The proprietor is manning the Crazy club.  Kadizzle thought he better go check on Skavietch at his garage.  Poor old Skavietch had his wife pass away a few years back.  He was enamored with his wife and just cannot get over her passing.  Walking through his home without his wife in it makes him sad, so Skavietch moved out into the garage.  In the garage he set up a table, a refrigerator with beer, and of course a television. Already dying from cancer old Skavietch sits there, smokes, drinks a beer and lets life go on.  When Kadizzle came in the garage door the first thing he notice was that it appeared someone beat the hell out of Skavietch. Inquiring into the devestation Skavietch told Kadizzle a BS story about what happened, then the truth came.  In a fit of coughing from the fungus in his lungs Skavietch passed out and fell into the bathroom.  He came to with no idea of where he was or what happened.  Of course being Skavietch he did not go to the hospital.  He was out cold to the extent his bladder let loose.  He did accomplish one thing.  What ever his head hit it knocked the switch to his brain enough to get him to realize he needs to quit smoking.  At the drug store he is going to get some pills to quit smoking.

After a round of reminiscing and telling the same stories over Skavietch gave Kadizzle some fresh sweet corn right out of the garden.

Yesterday Kadizzle put the good ship back into shape. So the boat will be ready Thursday to head west and wrap up the sailing season.

I pity the country

The good llife

Kadizzle loves his two little girls, Evie, and Sylvie.  Sylvie pictured above has lived the dream life so far. An only child with two parents that adore her, does it get any better. With both Erin and Fran working Sylvie has spent a lot of time with nannies. The good news is most of them were wonderful. First it was her aunt who loved her and taught her like she was her own. Next she had her own art teacher that planned many days full of projects.  So far Sylvie has had an education like few children. The big goal is to raise an educated person that is not spoiled, cares for others, and enjoys the world. So far things are looking good.  As Sylvie enters third grade she can look back on so many trips, adventures, and educational experiences. It has all paid off. Sylvie is a writer, an artist, an actor, a gymnast, and full of energy, perhaps too much.  Best of all Sylvie is following the family tradition of being a great outdoor person. Erin said Sylvie played by herself in a mountain stream for ten hours.

As a child Kadizzle remembers his love for the West Virginia mountains and hills. Giving a child the gift of enjoying the outdoors is a wonderful thing, and Sylvie has the gift.  Hiking with the little energy bundle is fun. She does not whine.  Coming off the mountain to keep her going she insisted her dad tell her stories. Fran did a good job and reviewed all sorts of things for the imp.

Nine, Nine children, what were they thinking?

Two people got married.  Children came in a flood.  Kadizzle was number seven of nine.  In twelve years my mother produced nine children.  A tribe was created.  There is no shortage of stories.  Remember any event, and you get nine versions.  After 68 years seven of the nine still breath air.  Heart attacks have been popular.  Younger brother went on to the great beyond at 49 as his heart gave out.  Oldest and second from the start had a heart attack that came within inches of getting him.  The big Kahuna sister had her episode with the heart.  Mother died at 60 when her heart went bad. Number four went out on the couch in the middle of the night and never woke up.  Another heart failure. Kadizzle sits here still ticking strongly.

A family of nine has it all.  We have some genuine crazies, some marginal.  We have one down and out. When the dust settles both our parents would probably be amazed how well most of the gang turned out economically. It would be fair to say eight out of nine crossed the line into good prosperity.  A lot of college degrees came out of the flock. Two sisters completed law school. One sister got her PHD from a famous school. All but one of the nine attended college. The one that missed college took his turn being an alcoholic, then gave that up to start a very successful business.  One lessen everyone learned was, " Don't have nine children".  No one had more than two.  Think about it had we followed our parents there would be 81 grand children.

Someone should have written down all the trials and tribulations. The history would have made a good book. All of us were raised back in the hills of West Virginia.  Everyone like to think of West Virginia as a bunch of hill billies, but that is far from accurate. We grew up in Wheeling, West Virginia. Wheeling was a very sophisticated city.  In 1894 it was the wealthiest city in the United States.  That wealth lingered for a long time, and Wheeling was not a city of miners shacks. Wheeling was a city of marble mansions and a large flock of the Bill Gates type. Wheeling was a steel town, but also the home town of many companies that went on to join the Dow Jones top companies.

Wheeling was the jumping off point for people going west. As St. Louis took over Wheeling gradually sank.  When he steel mills shut down it was pretty much game over. Right after World War two my grandfather was the mayor of the town. At that time Wheeling was cooking right along with a population of about 80,000.  Steel mills, coal mines, heavy machine works, casting, a thriving glass industry, and being the western terminus of the B&O made Wheeling a hub of prosperity.  Wheeling hosted WWVA.  WWVA was the second radio station in the country.  Watch any old movie and when you see people sitting around the radio you will hear the radio station identify itself as WWVA.  The radio station reached deep into Canada and across the U.S.  People came to Wheeling to gamble illegally, to enjoy the whore houses, and the horse race track on Wheeling Island.

The Interstate was the ruination of West Virginia. Prior to the interstate it was a struggle to get through West Virginia, now you just buzz by and don't spend a dime. West Virginia's saddest legacy is the people bought into the Republican Party.  In the old days West Virginia was about as union and democratic as you could get.  That was back in the prosperous days.  Today West Virginia has succumbed to the right wing rhetoric of Fox News.  Now all the people in the hills are being fed lies by Trump that the coal industry will come back.  It ain't going to happen, but it is fun dream.  Just like the lottery ticket the fool buys, the Republicans thrive on selling false dreams so it goes.  So out here on the prairie Kadizzle sits thinking about those folks in the hills who are cashing their welfare checks waiting for The Donald to make them great again.  Enjoy that welfare cheese, and keep on believing.

Sovereign came back a winner

As the crew gathered at the good ship it was discovered our steed was lame.  The hydraulic backstay had a leak and was useless.  The backstay is the system that supports the mast from the stern of the boat.  Mrs Kadizzle was in a bit of panic and did not think the boat could be sailed in that condition, but after some I dare say ingenious rigging the ship was good to go.  As the race began it looked hopeless and Kadizzle was cursing the monkeys at the weather office in Bismarck.  Everyone sat waiting for a gust of wind.  Nothing, absolutely nothing.  The temptation was to call off the race, but finally around one  the wind slowly came up.  It turned out to be a nice racing breeze.  As usual there was a lot of confusion at the start.  Three horn sequences are supposed to be blown to signify when the start is. Well they left out one set.  Non the less the good ship got a good start. Sovereign took off like a bullet and won the first race with a wide margin.

The Wolsky family with a racing father, and two racing sons has give Kadizzle grief because we win every year. Papa Wolsky claimed he set up the race with one buoy set in shallow water that the Sovereign could not get through. This was not true, but the Wolsky gang did have a trick up their sleeve.  On the second race the North buoy was not there.  The state park crew thought there would be only one race so after the first race they took the buoy down.  Josh Wolsky told the park crew to set the buoy in a different place.  This created a unique situation for the Sovereign.  The race was already in progress as the park crew tried to set the buoy.  So the Sovereign was steaming toward a buoy that was not there.  It appeared the park crew stopped to drop the buoy in the water so Sovereign headed toward them.  This meant an extra tack and that cost time.  Moving toward the apparent location of the buoy we had to round the park crew started moving.  Never has Kadizzle been in a race with markers that moved.  Sovereign was not foiled, we followed the park crew and rounded the buoy they still had in their boat.  Being first around the buoy we headed right back at the rest of the fleet coming right at us.  As god would have it Sovereign was on a starboard tack. Sailboat racing give the boat on starboard tack the right of way.  The evil in Kadizzle came out.  Kadizzle realized he could force a lot of boats off course.  The two boats of the Wolskey fleet were in perfect position to be jostled.  Kadizzle was able to force "Hellow Kitty" off course costing them some precious time.  We could not get to Pappa Wolskey but he was not a problem with a very heavy boat.

Sovereign won the second race also.  As explained earlier the rules have been set up so if we win we do not get the trophy.  This is actually good because it gives  others incentive to participate.  Sovereign was entitled to the second place trophy which was a nice painting of a sailing ship. The Sovereign crew donated the second place trophy to the third place winner.  The day turned out to be a lot of fun and people watching on shore seemed to enjoy the insanity.  Rarely do you see a race where they move the buoy, the first place winner gets the second place trophy, the second place winner gets the first place trophy, and the third place winner gets the second place Trophy, so the real winner goes home with nothing but a smile. A good time had by all.

Race Day

The big race it today.  Kadizzle called the National Weather Service at 5:30 this morning for the wind forecast.  Rarely do they get it right on race day.  Apparently they have a cage full of monkeys that throw darts.  One dart hit a wind direction, and another hits the speed. The report is complete. Now if the monkeys did a good job the wind will pickup around noon. To avoid the wind we will try to start and finish the race before the wind comes up.  That seems to be the pattern.

Kadizzle thought he might print out rules for the crew.

1. Losing is not an option
2. The captain must be obeyed
3.  Everyone on the boat is the captain
4.  Pull any line you would like whenever you want.
5.  If the helmsman tells you something ignore it if it doesn't suit your needs.
6.  Disagree on all decisions.
7.  Blame all failures on anyone but yourself.
8.  Make a list of reasons for failure.
9.  If we win take personal credit.
10. If we lose blame it on anything but our performance.
11. Have fun at any cost.

So if all goes well we meet Ruth and Rodger at 8, head across to the marina on the north side.  If history is any prediction the wind will be nonexistent.  The last two regattas had a decent wind for the start that died by the second buoy.  Please wind Gods don't do that again.

Last year Stroupini was on the crew. We were in the process of hoisting the mainsail. Kadizzle had a strong feeling Stroupini would screw up a one car funeral. Kadizzle told Stroupini to raise the main halyard just a little so Kadizzle could hook it to the Mainsail.  Of course Stroupini pulled on the halyard like he was trying to hang someone. The halyard jerked out of Kadizzle's hand and went up the mast too far to reach.  With the race about to start we had to hoist Stroupini up the mast to retrieve the halyard.  Doing this as we motored toward the start line was no easy task, but we made it.

A lot of the people who have not participated in sailboat races do not understand the importance of the start.  Sailboats start races while moving. The boats jockey for position waiting for the gun to be fired which signals you can cross the line.  In order to fight for position it is normal to force other boats out of the way according to the rules. This means at times you must come extremely close to the other boat, often within a few feet.  To the uninitiated it seems intimidating, but that is the fun of it.  Politeness in yielding right of way usually means you are going to lose. The boat on starboard tack has the right of way.  If you can force the other boat to tack it slows him down.

How do the Bee's do it?

For the second time Kadizzle had a collision with a bee.  The last time the flying Kadizzle on the motorcycle ran into a bee was just three weeks ago.  Your going down the road at 55 mph and suddenly you feel a sting. Same thing yesterday going 35 mph.  It happens so fast. The only feasible explanation Kadizzle can muster is that he is running into the back of the bee.  After all that is where the stinger is.  The inside of my right arm is sore this morning from the sting.  The solution seems to be wear a jacket.

Made the rounds yesterday on the remeadigus.  Stopped at the Crazy Club.  Shiny is on vacation so the proprietor has to run the joint for a few days.  As Kadizzle chatted up the owner Stroupini stopped in.  Stroupini has taken on an odd job.  The Sheriff appointed him guardian for a lady with mental problems. The lady would make an excellent member of the club.  However, she is being detained in the big crazy club in Jamestown where the professionals are kept.  Seems he lady tried to run over a policeman. Not a good idea.  Stroupini is trying to sort out her financial affairs and do what he can to get the woman's life in order.

Over at Rita's crazy club we discussed recruitment.  Rita lost two of her prize nut cases and needs some new members.  Our crazy club was considering a cookout in the Pocket Park.  After we did the budget and found we had no money for real cookies Shiny cut out a picture of cookies and put it beside the coffee.  That gave us the idea to put a picture of cheeseburgers on the grill. Anyone who asked for one and ate it would be considered for membership.

Back at the ranch we are catching up on the clothes washing, folding, and putting away from the trip. The grass has been cut and hauled away.  Now the time has come to pay the bills. To avoid exchange rate fees in Canada we used a lot of different credit cards.  Figuring out how to pay all the blood suckers will be a task for today.  Both our offspring are experiencing the twin frustrations of raising a child and making a living.  Now they get a chance to see how their parents lived.   Unable to sleep Kadizzle got up at 4:30.  No real news, perhaps the Trumpster will fire out an insane tweet today.  The Republicans are up the creek in Texas without a paddle.  Their own rednecks are wet and need help.  This looks like they may have to change their song.  No more money for the wall, no more demeaning big government.  Now the government is supposed to fix the mess climate change created in Texas.  Of course there is no such thing as climate change induced by man.  Ted Cruz bitched about the federal government helping out New York when the storm hit there.  Poor old Ted along with the rest of the greed dogs will be enjoying meals of crow for some time.  Mother nature has dope slapped the Republican better than anyone could have dreamed.  Like it or not they now have to show compassion for something other than tax breaks.

Another big battle continued yesterday.  The ASUS computer started to smoke and died while Kadizzle lay in bed surfing the intergoogle.  Computers can die like anything else, but they should not emit smoke when they die.  It would be nice if a big puff of smoke comes out some orifice on Kadizzle when he dies, but not from the computer.  The battle begins with ASUS.  For a computer company they seem very confused.  Call number one went like this, " We will get back to you in 24 hours".  Never heard from them.  Second third and fourth call about the same.  Each time they said the safety department would call.  Six days later the safety department set up a time to call.  The call was set for eleven. No call, so Kadizzle called them.  OK we will call you within an hour. No call.  After days of frustration they finally called and Kadizzle convinced them they needed to do something.  So the computer gets shipped back today.

We are living in an age where people have bombs in their pockets, and in their lap. Imagine a computer catching fire on a plane.  A friend did not have to imagine it, her plane made an emergency landing because a lap top caught fire. Modern devices try to pack a lot of energy into a small space.  When that energy is mismanaged a fire often results.  People with E-cigarettes have their pants catch fire.  Phones melt, and so do computers.  What if you walk out of the room and come back to find the room on fire because your laptop caught fire? Not good.  As we go to electric cars we may have cars that melt.  It has already happened with the Tesla.  The stuff batteries are made of burns unlike a lot of other things. You are dealing with some exotic metals that water cannot put out.  Airplanes now scare me more.  Some laptop in the cargo hold may decide to burst into flames, not good.  Kadizzle has been called a flaming idiot, but he does not want to become one with a laptop in his hands.

Second Place

The Kadizzles are back home with the grass needing cut.  A long smokey drive across Washington, Montana, and North Dakota. The planet is melting and no one notices.  Kadizzzle has seen the dead reefs in Belize, The forest on fire in the Northwest, and the insane floods in Texas, yet the magical Republicans deny there is a problem.

Off subject already.  The race, the sailboat race is scheduled for Saturday. Kadizzle has put his team together. There will be a nice trophy of pure silver.  Now the strange part, the Kadizzle team has been prohibited from winning.  Last year before the race Kadizzle was told that " If you come in first you will get the second place trophy".   The problem is the good ship won in past years by an astounding margin.  This was the result of a fast boat, and a good captain.  Well not really, we had good starts and more important good luck.  Now the puzzling part.  If the second place winner gets the first place trophy, it seems that it would be easy to drop back to second place. Maybe not.  When sailboats race and they are of different make and model the boats are scored by a Performance Handicap Racing system.  This means a fast boat must win by a margin.  For example we might have to beat all the other boats by twenty minutes.  So if you deliberately came in second you would have to carefully cross the finish line by some exact margin.  Maybe we could wait at the finish line and let the second place boat cross.  That would not guarantee us second in this strange system because we would have to beat boat number three by a specific margin.  Trying to figure out how to come in second becomes very complicated. Add to the this the fact that they might deny us the trophy anyway and we have a mess on our hands.  Actually the idea is to get more people racing, so we don't really care.  As long as people have fun and learn something about sailboat racing it is mission accomplished.

One of the best ever

The Kadizzles are headed back to the prairie.  Years ago we met Darch. Darch is an esteemed international member of the Crazy Club in Hazen.  Darch came to Hazen to ride the Ma Da Hey trail this summer. A finer athlete over 70 cannot be found. Darch invited us to sail in the Broken Island chain on his 35 foot catamaran.  It was a wonderful trip and would be hard to beat. The weather was perfect,

Perhaps tomorrow I will ad some photos.  Compared to our boat the catamaran was luxurious.  Each hull had a double bunk and it's  own head with a shower.  The salon was roomy and very comfortable. The stability of a catamaran is an easy sell. No healing got to be pretty nice to live with.  The scenery, the coves, and the company were spectacular.  On our last day out we finally caught some salmon.  What  a meal. The first day out Darch pulled up his crab pot with six nice specimens.  Clams and oysters were do da to gather and we could harvest them at will.

The highlight of the trip was a dingy trip to Lucky Falls.  Unbelievable beauty, magnificent pools of crystal clear water, and  of course we had a wonderful swim. Kadizzle was so tempted to dive from a forty foot cliff into a bottomless pool, but thought better of it.  We are tired so that is all for today.

Free was free

The Toyota had a slow leak on the left rear side of the car.  Discount tire in Burlington, Washington said " bring it in, we will fix it for free".   Well, they did.  Mr. and Mrs Kadizzle thought it was a trick, but they were very nice and did not try to sell us a new tire.  So give them one hundred good boy points.

Today if all goes as planned we take the car ferry to Canada.  Mrs. Kadizzle has an expired passport so she may never be able to return to our country.  Also we are now closer to North Korea.  So if the two crazy men get in a nuclear battle we may get rained on by missiles.  Mrs. Kadizzle had the brilliant idea of fresh seafood for dinner.  Four shrimp each and a small serving of crab meat came to 31 bucks for the food we took back to the hotel to eat.

Tomorrow we will be sailing in Vancouver.  Kadizzle has done a lot of sailing, but for some strange reason ocean sailing makes him prone to sea sickness.  Somehow the brain can deal with simple lake waves, but it is the swells that mix with the waves Kadizzle cannot sort out.  Hopefully this will not be a problem.  The best solution is to be topside and keep an eye on the horizon.

Other than the wonderful scenery, our entertainment has been the Trump meltdown.  Every time you think he has had it and reached the bottom he goes lower.  It has been a long time since any president has come close to being as bad as the current self obsessed clown.

Bear in a Box

Somewhere near Twisp we camped for the night.  Ran into bear hunters.  The outside of the bear was in the big cooler including the head.  This would be the run and the trophy.  The rest of the coolers had the meat.  Kadizzle thinks you should leave the bears alone, but these guys did not.  They gave Mrs Kadizzle some bear meat sausage, Mr. Kadizzle wanted none.  Nice guys, but leave the bears alone.

Back to yesterday, forgot to mention the Testicle festival. Some little town in Montana near Drummond had a testicle festival going on.  Since Kadizzle has had prostate cancer and a vasectomy he decided not to enter. Looked like a big ring dang do for a little town.   Some fella is traveling with three Maltese dogs on his motorcycle.  What a set up.  Three little boxes that a dog head sticks out of.  He was at the campground and we shot the BS.  He was a real BS competitor.  We talked all the talk we could til we gave out.

Crazy Day already

Looks like the tire is low, so we stop for air.  A girl falls out of her truck. Asks Mrs. Kadizzle for 87 cents to get beer.  Mrs Kadizzle in surprize move ask Mr Kadizzle to give her the money.  We give simple minded girl a dollar, she never says thanks.  Why did Mrs K want to give a girl money for beer at eight in the morning?  Who knows.  Kadizzle explains to the girl she has a problem.  Kadizzle tries to give girl advice.  Ask if the girl is on meth, she says she is not.  Kadizzle tells girl they should not drink and drive.  Girl says they have death wish.  As Kadizzle drives away thinks he should have got license number and alerted police.  Hope the dingers don't get hurt or kill someone.  Stupid move to give her a buck. What will we do stupid next.  Heading North and West.

Drummond Montana

Up and awake, just poured coffee at Drummond rodeo grounds.  Dropped into another world. Trains rumbling by all night.  Smoke from forest fires as the planet burns to the ground.  Slept in the tent.

Up Early and heading West

Kadizzles will head west.  Darch invited us to sail near Vancouver so off we go today.  Across the wild Montana, mile, after mile, until only the ocean stops us. What a change from a dried up prairie to nothing but water. Darch has a nice catamaran.  It will be a first for these monohull sailors.  If the seafood from the back of the boat is a good as Darch says we will live the life of ease.

When we cross into Canada we will leave the crazy mess of Trump behind.  However, Trump may end up with missiles raining down on the wrong country if the aim of North Korea is poor. The recent insanity of Trump has been fun to watch.  The best part was when his trainer, controller, or whatever had that " Oh No!" look on his face as Trump departed from his printed script.

We will travel through some heavy bubba country and woods that surely have gun nuts, Nazi flags, and are ready to rise up and help Trump make America Great.

As a kid you never thought some of the things  you have seen happen would.  Clinton getting a tune up from Monica was a big surprize.  Electing a black president was amazing, but a totally mentally ill man has now topped the game.  Only his hard core supporters do not notice he is suffering from some kind of strange mental illness.

A comedian had a great idea, make Trump King.  Be like England.  Have a King that is just a simple minded fool with no power.  Trump could go around in a king outfit and he would be the happiest man on Earth.  Part of the castle could have a Trump Tower.  As King he would be harmless and he could choose any titles he wants.  He could be " His royal purveyor of Truth".  As a figurehead we could send him around the world, and keep our own country safe.  Of course when he emerged from the castle there would be Trumpeteers praising him.  His majesty the grabber could ride around in a carriage pulled by donkeys.  We would tell him they were unicorns.

Washington Phillips - Denomination Blues, Pt. 1

41 Idiots

North Dakota is a great place to live, but the people do not get out much.  The legislature in North Dakota is made up of old goats.  The goats graduated from the coffee shops in their home town.  Our legislators live in a small world.  In the small world everyone needs a gun, in the small world Fox News is the only news.   Awhile back North Dakota made the national news with the pipeline protest.  The goats went wild. What should we do? One simple minded goat in the legislature came up with a law that would pretty much hold a person harmless for running down a protester with you car.  52 sane normal legislators voted against this bill, but 41 idiots voted for it.  Now that is pretty scary the high percentage of plain vanilla idiots we have elected in North Dakota.  The North Dakota legislature is owned lock, stock, and barrel by the Republicans.  North Dakota has fallen under the spell of right wing media.  Rush, KFYR radio, or some simple minded blogger make up some right wing crap, and now it is doctrine.  The typical right winger in North Dakota reads and listens to nothing but those outlets that will assure them Trump indeed was sent by God.  Reality has left the mind of the Republicans.  Trump followers believe their Jesus can do no wrong.

The Dog smelled a Democrat

Kadizzle got on the scale yesterday, the news was disheartening. The gravity in the bathroom was extreme.  To solve the problem Kadizzle headed north on his bike.  With earphones on and a good music playlist the day was about as good as it could be.  There may have even been a little tailwind.

As the road got near 1806 ten miles North of Hazen Kadizzle saw the flag pole in the yard.  Today it just had the American flag flying.  On many days a Trump flag would fly from that pole.  Kadizzle wanted to average 14.5 miles per hour for the trip so he was moving pretty well as he approached the compound of idiocy that flies a Trump flag.  On the bike speedometer it showed 20mph.  The Trump dog smelled a Democrat and came racing out onto the highway to taste the sweet meet of a fat Democrats leg.  Kadizzle thought the dog could not do twenty, but he was wrong. The dog got ahead of the bike as he nipped and almost caused a good man to go down.  Kadizzle will fight Trump and his dog to the end.  Peddling furiously Kadizzle pulled ahead.  The dog was left behind, but Kadizzle had to shortly return the same way.

You cannot reason with Trump supporters, so Kadizzle needed a plan for the return trip.  As Kadizzle pedaled toward the intersection with 1806 he searched for the appropriate weapon.  As if God intended Kadizzle to defeat the evil minion of Trump there it was.  Leaning on the fence post on the right was a long light steel pipe, perfect for educating a Trump supporter.  With the pipe Kadizzle headed back toward the Trump compound.  Sure enough his dog Steve Bannon came running after Kadizzle.  Dismounting the bike Kadizzle got into his battle stance with the pipe.  Both the dog and the Trump supporter that owned him realized what would happen.  Dog brain hesitated and rethought his attack, Trump man captured the dog and all was well.  Teddy Roosevelt said " Walk quietly and carry a big stick".   Kadizzle says ride quickly and carry a light pipe about ten feet long.  So the pipe rest about a half mile before Trumps four legged minion.   Bear spray may be the next surprise for the four legged barker.  The dog will find Democrats smell tasty, but have a bitter odor that burns your eyes and nostrils.

Who will be next?

As a young person you rarely thought about who would be next. Who would be next to be shipped to Vietnam might have been a thought, or who would be next to get married.  As an old guy 68 who will be next has become a different thought. At 68 old Kadizzle now has seen a lot of people drawn up to the great beyond.  In his career mining, and power planting Kadizzle got to know hundreds of people. Add to that friends, relatives, and the guy down the street and when you ask "Who will be next?", it takes on a big number. The system has no rhyme or reason.  A healthy person is struck down with cancer. An old goat that smoked himself to an extreme is still puffing at 70.  A skinny guy dies of a heart attack while the big lard ass who never exercised in fifty years is still stuffing himself with sausages like he is a sausage.

When the big wheel spins the good get struck down just like the rotten scoundrels.  Are those people somewhere else or are they atoms no longer associated with each other?  Each of us will have a magic moment where we find out.

So all you leave behind is the good you have done or the evil you promoted. You were on a planet with billions of people.  Did you improve it? Did you take more than your share?

Hamburger Man

I have got to remember, it is a fine memory, that soft naked lady God meant her to be.  That is how the song goes, but this is a different memory.  A thousand, maybe two thousand years ago I worked at the Burger Chef in my little suburb of Woodsdale.  This was back in the hills of Wheeling, West Virginia. It was a high school  job.  Mike Walen, who I also played football with at Triadelphia worked there too.  His nickname was The Wale.  Mike had a habit of yelling " Duke is on" or  "Duke is off".   Duke was the older guy who managed the place for the owner.  If The Wale yelled " Duke is on"  everyone knew to put on their best behavior and sparkle things up a bit.  One day Duke somehow got into the building without The Wale knowing it.  The Wale did see Duke's car out in front as he cooked french fries.  The Wale thought Duke had just arrived when actually Duke was standing right behind him.  The Wale bellowed out " Duke is on" and then turned to find Duke right behind him.

The hamburger dispensary was deliberately designed so customers could look into the cooking area.  Being able to see the entire process meant customers could decide for themselves about the cleanliness.  The place was kept very clean.  Hamburgers were cooked on a chain.  Never since then have I seen such a set up.  The raw patties were put on the chain and as it moved through flames on top and on the bottom the meat was cooked.  The device was like a conveyor belt and could turn out a lot of hamburgers.  Sometimes during exam periods West Liberty students would order hundreds of hamburgers.

To make the math simple all prices were in 15 cent increments.  Once you got to know the multiples of 15 making change was easy.  Looking back it was amazing how much math and how many order you could do at one time.

At the end of the day often there were be some stray cheeseburgers left over.  These became lunch the next day at high school.  A lot of stories still told today took place there.  The parking lot was a gathering place for teens at that time.

Often particularly on Sundays a line would build up of people waiting to purchase food.  Some fool would come in and stare at the menu printed on a large board over the counter area.  As the person staired everyone would get irate.  Frustrated I often said " Next please, please next, can I help you or are you beyond help?".   This would somehow get the attention of the gawker, and things wouuld go on.

The pay was less than a dollar an hour, but it kept my budget going.  Pickles for the hamburgers came in large wooden barrels,  the french fries were made fresh.  A large potato peeler machine that basically sanded the skin off operated in the back.  Each potato was put by hand into a device that cut  it into fries.  The Wale cooked the fries and did a good job.  Often he was making fries and dipping a few into the tarter sauce to eat while he worked.  This did his weight no good.

One night the I was at the front counter and a customer burst through the front door.  The customer immediately flung a bag of hamburgers at me he had previously bought.  The customer yelled " I don't have to eat this crap anymore".   The man was very irate.  I ducked, and the hamburger sack flew into the back of the building.  Sort of panicking I told the man " I don't cook these things, he does" and I pointed to the night manager.  Somehow they resolved the issue, but it was fortunate the counter was built in a way customers could not get to us.

Another incident I clearly remember because it was so bizarre. The hamburger patties came premade. You dropped them quickly on the conveyor chain and let them cook.  The process became so routine no one payed much attention to what was going on, or even closely looked at the finished product.  A customer came back to the counter with a hamburger he had just purchased.  He said he wanted to show it to the manager.  Opening the hamburger there it was.  Right in the middle of the cooked patty was a piece of cowhide.  It had the skin and hair still on it.  Something had gone wrong in the processing.  The manager said to the customer " What do you want me to do about it?".  The customer said " I want another one".   The manager was a smart ass, and could not resist.  He replied " We don't have anymore like that".  I was surprised the incident was resolved so easily.  The man got another burger and seemed satisfied.

It was my first real job.  I learned a lot.  I learned to show up, shut up, put up, and grow up.  I learned how to treat people, and I learned I could do a lot more in my head than I thought.  A lot more stories could be told about what went on at the Burger Chef, but to protect the people involved you don't get to read them.

Hacked and The National Association for Advancement of Humanity.

Somehow a digital dinger hacked into our Amazon account.  Kadizzle did not get too excited, but Mrs Kadizzle went nuts.  The clandestine person who apparently was in Michigan, more likely India,  sent themselves a couple of gift certificates.  Amazon took the charges off our credit card.

The insanity was canceling cards and changing passwords.  Part of what gave Mrs Kadizzle great consternation was the fact that some of our passwords were on a computer accessible place. For security that is all the detail Kadizzle can give.  Kadizzle has now encrypted the passwords.  In the hidden little digital place the passwords now are they are not what they appear to be.  If the sneakers use their computer to try a brute force attack it will take a century or two.  The sneakers and their friends in India will see smoke coming from the computer.

The other day when Kadizzle was visiting the missile launch facility the gang stopped for lunch.  At lunch Kadizzle got a call from a woman with a thick Indian accent.  The woman claimed to be from Amazon and asked some questions about our credit card.  The restaurant was so noisy Kadizzle could not hear the woman clearly and never gave her any information, but she did seem to have the last four digits of the Amazon card.  Undoubtedly she was part of the fraud.

So now we have a higher level of security, but when we need a password it will be like the British trying to decipher the German code.  We can do it, but it will take some doing.  One thing everyone has learned by now is when you get a call from someone in India, more than likely it aint a good idea to tell them anything.  One thing they may be doing is simply verifying your phone number.  That is what Kadizzle thinks Mrs Gandhi was doing.

Kadizzle has a policy of answering his phone.  If you call and the phone does not show a legitimate person or number is calling,  you may get this answer, " Hello, this is The National Association for the Advancement of Humanity".    Next you will be asked who you are.   Sometimes this works out strangely.  Kadizzle writes a lot of letters to the Bismarck Tribune.  The Tribune always calls to verify the letters.  The Tribune number always shows up as  "unknown".  Consequently they get The National Association for the Advancement of Humanity answer.  Fortunately the Tribune has figured out how this works.  In summary if you call me and I don't know you, please identify yourself.

The Missile Silo

Shanika, Stoupini, and Kadizzle made the long trip to Cooperstown ND.  We inspected the launch facilities for the nuclear missiles.  The woman conducting the tour had a terrible squeaky voice combined with a laugh that made you glad she was not your wife.  What a job.  Being in the Air Force as a missile launcher had to be the most boring monotonous job on Earth.  Sitting underground in a large cement egg for 24 hours did not seem like fun.  There was one bed so one person could sleep.  The silliest thing in the launch set up was the key that activated the missile.  One the key it was printed " Do Not Duplicate".   Imagine someone going to a hardware store with a key to start a nuclear war and asking the clerk to make a couple.

Everything about the launch site screamed 1950's technology, and decor.  The Russian facilities could not have been much worse.  According to our host the Russians have taken the tour at Cooperstown. Insanity is all you can think when you inspect.  With hundreds of these missiles still in operation in North Dakota it is reassuring to know we have an insane president that could easily get us into a nuclear meltdown.  The poor guys in the bunker have a very strange escape route after the war ends.  They get to emerge from a tunnel into a landscape that will be toasted.  To get up the tunnel they first have to open it. One major problem the tunnel is filled with sand.  So after the war when the food and water in the launch site are used up and leaving is the last option the fellows below have a special way to open a trap door.  When opened a lot of their living space will fill with sand from the tunnel.  Out they will scramble with most of the world's population dead or radioactive.  Emerging one might say to another " Gee I wish I had not voted for Trump".

How Appropriate.

Even though Trump just started beating his war drum yesterday Shanika had been planning for the Crazy Club to have an outing to a missile silo.  North Dakota has always hurt for tourism, so over in the Eastern part of the state they made a missile silo into a tourist attraction. That is where we will go today. Missiles grow like sunflowers in North Dakota.  When old Kadizzle first moved to North Dakota he remembers driving out in the middle of nowhere and seeing missile silos.  Thankya Jeesus no missile ever popped up out of one.

Now Kadizzle might get to see his first launch.  The old crazy Trumpster is going after North Korea.  North Dakota has more missiles than any country on Earth.  Most of them are north of the lake about fifteen miles from here, but as flat as the prairie is here it will look like the fourth of July if Trump pushes the button.  Sometimes killing a fly with a sledgehammer gets the job done, and if there is ever a guy for that task it is Trump.  When Trump tells a lie he uses a big lie, even though a little lie might work.  His first big lie was Obama was born in Kenya.  The dolts that love him licked it up.  One good thing about Trump and his lies is he never comes through.  No wall, no destruction of Obama care, maybe the guy in North Korea knows the Trumpster is all bluster.

As the coffee goes down Kadizzle sits here in a world endangered by two crazy men.  One was not elected and the other one was just what we needed.  So let the day begin.

Drawn Up to the Lord

Dave got drawn up to the Lord.  Old Dave Smith finally took off for Heaven.  Long ago and far away Kadizzle had a coal mining career.  Kadizzle mined it under the ground, and on the ground.  Back at the Glenharold Mine Kadizzle met Dave Smith.  Smith was a big man then, his recent bad health shrunk him to half his size.  Dave was an inventive guy.  For a long time Dave was the oiler on the loading shovel.  The oiler had a lot of time on his hand, and you probably did not even really need and oiler.  There was not much an oiler could do when the shovel was working loading trucks, so Dave made do dads and invented things with the crap laying around on the shovel. Dave was mechanically inclined although he did not have much education.  Dave came up with a lot of clever stuff.

Dave had a special way of seeing the world.  Somewhere he always came up with jokes you had not heard before.  A story Kadizzle has told about Dave many times is how Dave got his foot under the 150 ton shovel.  One day Kadizzle was parked near the 190 loading shovel.  It was time to move the shovel closer to the coal so the loading could continue.  A job of the oiler was to move the large electric cable for the shovel as it moved.  By hand Dave acted as a human mule and grabbed the big electrical cable.  As Dave pulled on the cable Ron Hummel moved the shovel forward.   The steel tracks on the shovel were as tall as Dave.  Dave was not paying attention, but looking at Hummel for directions.  When the shovel crept forward it ran over Dave's foot.  Fortunately for Dave he was wearing the required steel toed shoes.  The 150 ton shovel track pushed Dave's foot into the mud.  Dave was trapped under the shovel with his foot.  He was unhurt, but was unable to extract his foot.  Hummel had to back the shovel up so Dave could get his foot out.  Kadizzle always told the story at safety meetings to explain why people needed to wear steel toed shoes.

Dave had to retire early because of a heart problem.  A heart implant kept him alive.  Almost on a daily basis Kadizzle would ride by Dave's garage.  Dave would be out there tinkering with the old hot rod he loved.  His ability to invent things never ceased to amaze Kadizzle.  Dave could take one thing and make it into another.  Kadizzle would stop and exchange insults, pleasantries, and just plain bullshit with Dave.   Dave was on the daily ramidigus route.   Dave was known locally as a character.  Dave was never the man you would suspect to be an artist, but he did take some art classes from Shiny.  Dave belonged to Rita's Crazy club.   Recently Kadizzle told Rita she needed to recruit.  Rita is very low on hard core crazy people.  With Dave gone to Heaven, and Crazy Bill out of town she has no hard core crazy people.  Somehow crazy people are like magnets they attract each other.   Rita and her gang will draw in some more crazy people.   Trump is great at attracting other crazy people like himself.  Hopefully Trump will invite all the crazy clubs to Washington for a convention.

Sex with a Peacock

I took my dad to the mall once to get him new shoes (he is 66).  We decided to grab a bite at the food court.

I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him… the teenager had spiked hair in all different rainbow colors — blue, red, green and orange.  My dad kept staring at her.  The teenager would keep looking and my dad would be staring every time.

When the teenager had had enough, she sarcastically asked,  “What’s the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?”

Knowing my dad, I quickly swallowed my food so I wouldn’t choke on his response — I knew he would have a good one.

In classic style he responded without batting an eyelid: “Got stoned once and fucked a peacock.   Just wondering if you were my daughter.”

Manhaven

For no known Earthly reason there has been a tradition among some old Hazenites to hike to Manhaven every year.  Manhaven is a town that used to exist below the dam.  Parking as close as we could with the group we embarked.  Stoupini and the women decided to go along the river.  Kadizzle thought poorly of this idea.  Brush and weeds were dense along the river, but up and away from the river it was almost open prairie.  Mrs. Kadizzle did have the good sense to go with Pat on a different higher route.  The prairie group made good time, but the stumblebums along the river proceeded very slowly.

Kadizzle was making very good time until he came to a very steep sided ravine.  With a little delicate climbing in and out he made it across.  The prairie group got to the town site long before the jungle trekkers.  Manhaven was an old town started in 1906 where grain was loaded onto the steamboats.  800 people may have lived there at one time.  Farmers brought the grain down to the river and the grain bins held the grain until the ship arrived.  Up on a high bank the grain was stored until it could be slid by gravity down to the boats.  One or two houses still survive in rickety condition.  A few features can still be discerned from the old buildings.

After a good workout walking, a drink at Little's Bar, and a ride home Lauren served a wonderful meal. Laughter and BS flowed.  Such is life on the prairie.

Three Old Men

Three motorcycles blasted west toward the Pacific.  Shanika, Carlos Stoupini, and Kadizzle headed to the land south of Zap. The idea was to find some good rugged roads to test our skills.  It never happened all we did was ride 76 miles on gravel and asphalt.  However, there was a lot of wonderful scenery.  Kadizzle was amazed by how few people are out there in the North Dakota outback.  Arizona has such amazing roads to explore compared to the tame roads of North Dakota.  This winter the old farts can get together in AZ to do it right.

Once home Shanika and Mrs. Kadizzle cooked up a very nice meal.  The conversation was good the wine and hooch flowed freely, and right after the meal the gravity increased to the point a nap was in order.  In other words Kadizzle drank too much and went to bed.

Yesterday Kadizzle got a good start and took the torn sail to Rita's for repair.  Rita and Diana fixed the sail with Kadizzle's help. Rita and Diana both have a good sense of humor and we had a great  time laughing as we put 135 feet of stitching in the sail.  Perhaps today the sail will go back on the good ship.  Once again the sun has risen and the adventures of the day will begin.  Mrs. Kadizzle is in the back of the house by the engine room getting up to date. Kadizzle has lubed her with coffee and water. Rain will fall and wind will blow, deer will die in the winter snow.

Report from the Crazy Club

Recent donations enabled the Crazy club to stock a nice supply of cookies.  The meeting was well attended.  Shanika was present with Stroupini.  Stroupini came in on the train and gave a niced report on sailing in Port Townsend.  Shanika says he has a new job lined up, but refuses to disclose what it is.  Mrs Kadizzle decided to attend the meeting.  After a variety of subjects were addressed the owner of the Club house showed up.  Recently he had attended Folk Fest in Winnipeg.  A report was given on the various performers.  Kadizzle feeling magnanimous with the recent Trump Bump in the stock market took the members to lunch at the Bison Bar and Grill in Hazen.  At the bar the Crazies were served by a young woman aspiring to be Miss North Dakota.   All the old goats gave the young woman advice and made a big donation in the form of a tip to her clothing budget. Miss Rodeo Mandan said it takes some snazzy clothes to win.

So here old Kadizzle sits with the Sonos going, and the coffee dripping.  What lies will Trump tell today.  More than likely someone will call him and tell him how great he is.  That has been the current trend.  What a wonderful country we live in.   A man clearly mentally ill, and a pathological liar is our leader, yet we keep chugging along unstopped by his childish insanity.  Get er done.  Americans don't let one monkey spoil the whole damn show.  With that in mind Kadizzle could use a good monkey.  Someone has to go up the sailboat mast and do some repair.  Stoupini volunteered for the job.  Stroupini is a lot lighter than old Kadizzle, so he may  get the job.   The next big task is to to take down the head sail and repair it.  Rita at the the other Crazy club said she would give it a try.

The rattle battle.

This is a photo from the rattlesnake mating we recently witnessed on the week long sail.  Mr. and Mrs rattler should expect some spunky little rattlers next spring.  Rattlesnake children get rattles soon after birth.  The site of these guys has changed Kadizzle's perspective on hiking in the Badlands.  Not sure what could happen swimming, but prior to their appearance Kadizzle was swimming nearby when he installed the boat tie downs on shore.  This was perfect snake country. 

Rant

When you think Trump can get no worse, he does.  Kadizzle is sitting here listening to NPR.  NPR just did a story on Trump suggesting to police officers they bang peoples head on the police car as they put them in the back seat.  The idiot we have for a president is unprecedented.  Whenever Trump gets caught in one of his insane statement he always claims it was a joke.  When you control nuclear weapons it is best not to confuse people about when you are joking.  Anyone who pays any attention to the national news knows police brutality is a hot topic.  Police shootings have been a real problem. Now, the president suggest a little bump on the head might be in order.  What if a person is innocent? What if before the entire facts are known the person arrested gets a nice head slam, and then it turns out the person was arrested by mistake?  In our country we commonly believe we do not torture people, and the police treat you as innocent until proven guilty.

The ability of Trump supporters to deny what they see and hear is amazing.  The incredible thing about the Trump gang is the support network.  You have Fox News caught in blatant lie, after lie, yet the Trump supporters watch Hannity cover up for the Trumpster every day.  In North Dakota there is a subculture of dolts that feed on KFYR right wing radio, Fox, and Rob Port.  Rob Port is an amature liar who works from his mother's basement.  This is not a made up item.  Check it out.  Port works from mom's home.  In North Dakota the newspapers will not pay a decent wage for real reporting.  The result is discount news.  A bunch of wanna bees make up stories, and the North Dakota news media prints it.

Our society has reached a new low.  Truth is what you want it to be, you can get someone to back you on any silly fantasy you have.  Now you get your news from the organization that tells you what you want to hear.  When you were a kid your parents read to you.  They read you made up stories you liked. Now we have Fox News, and Rush doing the same thing.  The theme is always the same.  A bunch of welfare cheats are trying to rob the rich.  Mexicans are invading, and liberals are brainwashing the young with real science.   The ultimate insanity of all this brain dead information age are the fundamentalist.  The people who love Jeeesus voted Trump into office.  The Jesus gang stands by the most vulgar man ever elected, the grabber.  How does this work?  How does the Jesus gand support a man obsessed with himself, and greed?  Is this really happening?

The Miracles of Jesus Under Trumpcare

The Rattlesnake fight

The week long sail is over.  People roasted by the sun have returned home.  The highlight of the trip was the rattlesnake fight.  Now no one is sure if it was a fight of a mating process.  Do rattlesnakes fight for proof of who is the dominant male? More research is needed, but this is what we saw.  After a slow sail down the Little Missouri to our usual spot near Quinn's crack the sailboats tied to shore.  The location is unique because the boats go about a half mile up a creek to tie off to the shore.  The little inlet is very narrow and the boats are on one side with an embankment on the other.  As the sailors sat on their boats doing what sailors do, drinking, eating, and telling lies, someone notices two rattlesnakes on the bank across from the boats.  These were big snakes.  The snakes were involved in what seemed like a strange mating ritual. The snakes would intertwine and do all sorts of snake gymnastics. In and out of the water they tumbled.  After an interlude they went back up the bank to the den.  Shortly they were back fighting or mating or doing whatever weird thing they were up to.  Quite a bit of commentary ensued of a sexual nature as various people tried to put words to what they thought was going through the snakes minds.  Some suggested they would have a cigarette after the mating ritual and we would see a puff of smoke.  As the fleet sailed homeward someone checked the internet to see exactly what the snakes were up to.  This is what led to the speculation it was two males fighting.

Of course a couple people had to get close to the snakes for pictures and videos of the action.  A small inflatable craft was launched for this purpose.  Now all the sailors which had been hiking and casually carrying on were concerned about the rattlesnake threat.  One boat put up their version of Trump's wall on the back of their boat to keep the snakes out at night.  It worked they were not attacked by rattlesnakes that night.  Kadizzle must admit these were the largest rattlesnakes he has ever seen.  Walk, hike, and enjoy North Dakota, but be prudent, look for these creatures.  They will run if you give them a chance, but it does not pay to surprize them.

The Week Long Sail begins.

One by one the ships will leave the harbor.  Old friends will do once more what some of us have done for over thirty years.  The sailboats will head west to explore and enjoy Lake Sakakawea.  It seems to take one week to get ready to do one week on the lake.  Ice, ice, and ice must be made.  Food, lots of food.  Drink of every sort, rum, vodka, gin, beer, and wine.  Goodies, that women pirates appear with on deck.  There will be swimming, snoring, flies, maybe a rattlesnake, and storms.  There will be days with too much wind, too little wind, wind from the wrong direction.  That is sailing.  There will be people sitting around the campfire.  There will be Doc mixing mojitos.  There will be people hiking Quinn's Crack, the famous route to the top in the Badlands.

Lots of old hands will be making the trip, and a few newer explorers.  It is a time to get to know the nooks and crannies of the lake.  With the lake high the fleet will be able to go way back into the best places.  When the big storm comes and the boats are all tied together in a huddle back in a bay it may be a Chinese fire drill or it may be a case of good planning that means merely going below and sitting it out.

So if you are near the lake in the next week and you see about a dozen boats working their way west it is the hard core sailors who have been looking fruitlessly for a Northwest Passage for 30 years.  Lewis and Clark led the way on the exact same route.  If we only read their journal we would know mountains block the way, but sailing around in a state of confusion is pleasant and who really cares?

Now if the wifi works and Kadizzle gets inspired he may fire off a report from the trip. With modern technology you are never really gone.

Matt Andersen - Coal Mining Blues

Far away and long ago Kadizzle used to crawl  in and out of an underground coal mine.  Well, not really crawl, we walked or rode on some conveyance.  However, this song touches my heart because it reminds me so much of those days.  You will never get more dirty than spending a shift in a coal mine.  Listen to the song it will explain it.  After you come out of the mine and try to wash in the bath house, you can never get all the coal dust off you.  The worst place is around your eyes.  When you see a coal miner in a bar he looks like a racoon because of the coal dust around his eyes. Give the song a listen.

Jack be nimble

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, pedal across the country on your riding stick.  Usually Kadizzle is the one who brings home stragglers, but Mrs Kadizzle announced when she came in the door that she had a straggler coming.  For years the Kadizzles have always picked up wayside travelers.  People doing the Lewis and Clark trail by bicycle often come through the little town of Hazen.  When you see someone pedelaning cross country you know two things, they need a shower, and a place to sleep.  You start a conversation and invite them over to stay the night.  After her encounter Jack, 76 years old pedaled into our driveway.  This was not Jack's first rodeo.  Jack had pedaled across country several times.

On the lake Kadizzle has often had the same experience with those making the Lewis and Clark journey by kayak or small boat.  Years ago Kadizzle met David Miller.  Dave was making the cross country jaunt doing research on Lewis and Clark by kayak.  Dave mentioned Kadizzle in the book he wrote about the trip.  Now, when Kadizzle picks up someone on the lake the conversation goes like this.  My name is Mike Quinn.  Are you the Mike Quinn in the book? Yes.  Every person coming down the Missouri by small boat somehow finds Dave's book.  It has become the manual for navigating the river.

Last night we sat in the living room and listened to Jack play his Indian flute.  If Kadizzle gets motivated he will post a short video on this site later.  It is 5:43 A. M. and the mind is just not ready for that task now.  So check back later.

Why not take care of strangers?  We live in a world swamped with Christians.  The Christian ethic is to help the stranger, but strangely the Christians seem to be the last to be of any real help.  A couple of these bike riders stayed with us a year or two ago.  From Hazen the went to Washburn.  At Washburn somehow they made arrangements to stay in the church basement.  This man and woman were supposedly doing missionary work as they biked across the country.  Interviewing them in Washburn after they spent the night Kadizzle asked where they slept.  On the basement cement floor of the church. Did the pastor give them dinner?  Nope.  Now of all people you would think the pastor would offer them a few accommodations, but hell no they were just a nuisance.  Many times Kadizzle has discussed the road orphans we take in with someone.  Often their reaction is " I would be afraid to do that".   Afraid of what?   How many people miss so much because they have unfounded fears?  We have probably taken in from ten to fifteen travelers passing through.  None of them robbed us, killed us or abused us in any way.  We were enriched by their stories and friendship.  We met real people.  We did not read about people in a book.  We did not read about other people's adventures we got to hear their book from their mouth.  So many people are poor because they chose to be poor.  They are poor in the experiences of life, because they are afraid to live.

Starving in the Grocery Store.

We live in a strange world.  There is plenty of everything. There is enough for everyone.  Yet Kadizzle was saddened yesterday when he read about how many people are scheduled to starve to death.  The other morning old Kadizzle happened to watch a program on how a Rolls Royce was built.  For some rich guy people are spending days building the custom made front for the radio.  Hours and hours are spent to make sure the rich guy has something no one else has.  All this while people are starving.  Now we have the good Republican Christians who say this gives people jobs building castles.  Remember when the slave owners said how much they improved the lives of Africans?  You can get your Rolls Royce in 44,000 different colors, but the guy who is going to starve cannot even get his choice of something to eat.  Ah yes, greed, it is so essential.  I must have more. I must have a bigger better one.  The guy with the biggest fastest is the best human.  Jimmy Carter the old president is going around building houses for poor people, he is a loser.  Trump the conniving, lying scoundrel is our hero.

We need schools, hospitals, drug treatment centers, jobs, and on the list goes, but what will we build first?  A wall, yup a wall.  The wall will keep Mexicans from coming to our country and putting up sheet rock, putting shingles on or roof and fixing us some good tacos.  We are drunk on greed, selfishness, paranoia, and ignorance.  How did we get this way?  Someone realized you can sell fear, fantasy, and entertainment.  Fox news showed the way, Rush chipped in.  

Now all this is not new.  Religion has been scaring the hell out of people for a long time.  Religion is was and probably will always be the mother of all cons.  You scare people that God is going to be pissed and fry them.  Next you tell people the best protection is to give the church a few bucks.  The church invented the idea of sit down, shut up, pay up, and die with a smile.  You just don’t question the church.  Nor do you question Fox, Pope Trump, or Rush.   Why would Jesus, Rush, or Hannity lie to you?  Well somehow they all got your money.

Don’t worry about any of this.  Go over to the gas station and get your lottery ticket.  You are bound to win.  Once you win, you can order that Rolls Royce and ignore all those people starving.  You can buy such a big flat screen TV that you will see Hannity life size.  Now, since you are reeking with cash you will need tax breaks.  Donate to the Republican party.  Go down to the coffee shop and let everyone know the welfare cheats are after the lottery money you won.  Life is great, it all makes sense.  You have to feel sorry not for those people starving, but for the dumbasses that never went to the gas station to get their lottery ticket.

Funeral Music

One thing Kadizzle wants at his demise is some good music.  So often listening to music Kadizzle thinks how nice the music would be for passing to the next world.  So give this one a listen, and play it as Kadizzle exits.

They just did not notice

Our wonderful friends the pharmaceutical companies.  You know the ones that have a pill to give you an erection.  Those same wonderful people just did not notice that in Kadizzle's home state of West Virginia they sold nine million Oxycontin pills.  What they did not notice was that only three million people live in West Virginia.  So every man woman and child got three pills.  Hmm?  If you came home and looked in your liquor cabinet and found that every bottle was empty would you notice?  Nope, fairies, and elfs got the hooch.  My favorite congressman Kevin Cramer tells me Mexico is where the drug problem comes from.  Wait congressmen, Mexico is not selling each person in West Virginia three Oxycontin.  The same wonderful drug companies are making sure Americans pay more for drugs than any other country in the world.  Get cancer, they make money.  Get addicted to pain killers they make money.  Would Cramer do anything about the real drug dealers that wear suits?  Hell no.  The drug dealers in suits give Cramer and his buddies big bucks.  The drug dealers in suits know that the best way to sell drugs is with the help of congress.  Why go through all that smuggling nonsense when you can buy a congressman for next to nothing?  So Kadizzle knows two young guys who have been made worthless, not by good old weed, but by the guys in suits.  Now we have the modern drug bust.  You don't go to a crack house, you go to a doctor's office where people are in line to get prescription pain pills.  Everyone wants to build a wall, but no one wants to put the doctors in jail.  When you have a serious problem and you are confronted with it always point the finger at someone else.  Nope, it is not me selling kids the drugs, it is those Mexicans.  What Mexicans?  Those Mexicans over there on the roof putting shingles down.  I thought they were roofers, nope they snuck across the border and are sell drugs.  OK, I got it now.  The truth is not what you think it is, the truth is not obvious, the truth is what Fox, Trump and Kevin Cramer tell you.

Leonard Cohen - You Got Me Singing - Lyrics You better watch and listen to this Read the lyrics.

The Remeadigus

Kadizzle took off on the Remeadigus yesterday.  What is a Remeadigus? Well it is a trip you take to talk to people. It is like a paper route, you talk to the same people.  The people on the trip are interesting to talk to and they all have unique and interesting views on life.  On the Remeadigus you exchange ideas, knowledge, and include a good dose of gossip, and political bullshit.

A couple people on the Remeadigus are car buff's.  They like nothing better than to tinker with an old car. Take it apart put it together and start all over.  Hazen is plagued with old car people. Their life goal is to go back in time by restoring a car and reliving their teenage years.  The first stop on the Remeadigus was a long chat with a piston head.  Now this guy is sort of self educated man of the garage. Kadizzle got into a long right wing, left wing debate with Piston head and his wife.  The mystery was where did they get their ideas.  They confessed to Fox News, but you could feel a lot of Rush coming through.

Always the Remeadigus includes the library.  At the library Kadizzle told a story.  Judy was not there and the new girl that just started does not seem to have much fire. After the library Kadizzle tried to check on Ezra.  Ezra is a liberal in a world of right wing farmers. Ezra works for the cooperative that sells the farm fertilizer.  Ezra was tied up so Kadizzle could not get his spin.

Mrs Kadizzle came home and said The Old Wood Chopper was depressed.  The poor Old Wood Chopper lost his wife a few years back and has had a hard time getting over it. The Wood Chopper comes to our house and does any chain saw or stump work we need.  The Wood Chopper comes at Christmas and cuts the wood for Festivus.  Every day the Wood Chopper sits in his garage and smokes, and drinks an occasional beer.  For all practical purposes he has moved into the garage.  People like Kadizzle stop by and visit him.  Wood Chopper's salvation has been his dog, and his son's dogs.  Wood Chopper and the dog watch television all day in the garage.  Kadizzle did what he could to cheer up Wood Chopper then went on.

Usually Kadizzle does not make the long treck into the country to check on the country Remedigus people, but the warm winds inspired Kadizzle to see the hermit. The hermit reads, and then reads someone. The hermit is extremely well read like his father.   In fact the hermit's father was a hermit.  Besides reading the hermit is a tinkerer.  Tinkering with guns, motorcycles, old cars, tractors, and once in awhile farm animals.  The hermit is a good liberal, so the conversation has an entirely different spin when you have a beer on the porch with the hermit.

Down the road from the hermit live an even more genuine hermit.  Kadizzle considered visiting that guy, but he is about as crazy as you can be and run around loose.  Let's call him Pharmaceutical.  Pharmaceutical has burnt out his brain cells to the extreme.  On the last visit to Pharmaceutical Kadizzle got a tour of his artifacts.  Pharmaceutical took Kadizzle to the grain bin that had been converted to a sauna.  There Kadizzle was shown what appeared to be ordinary rocks ( and they were), but Pharmaceutical convinced himself they were right handed and left handed Indian stones.  Kadizzle has seen a lot of artifacts, and these were nothing but stones picked from the creek, but Mr. Pharmacy was sure each rock had some special use.

The day finally came to an end of visiting and Kadizzle got a good cross section of humanity.  As some song writer said " It takes all kinds to make the world go around, but it only takes one to shoot you down".    And that is the way it is.

The Storm

With Mrs Kadizzle crippled by her arm injury Bob and Kadizzle had to man the ship.  The crew of three sailed west towards Heaven Bay.  Winds were decent but a storm was brewing in the area west of Beulah.  It seemed like a repeat of past incidents in the same area.  The storm seemed to be in two pieces.  To the north looked like the part that would hit us.  The northern storm came with a bit of furry but we got through it pretty quickly with only some soaked clothes.

It seemed like we would pass the other half of the storm on the north, but this was not the case.  We furled the sail down to a postage stamp size and the storm hit.  Bob and Mrs Kadizzle went below to stay dry. Kadizzle kept to the helm.  The storm seemed like he had winds in excess of fifty miles per hour.  Even with so little sail the boat made 4.5 knots.  Then the hail came.  At first it was just a pleasant diversion, but then the hail stones got bigger and Kadizzle got a good sting on the back so he went below with the rest of the crew. Rain was falling at such a rate there was no visibility.  Everything would be fine if the Sovereign had room to drift before hitting land.  With some stumbling the electronice finally came alive and our position was known. Things looked fine.  The main mean part of the storm passed and the wind simply and strongly came from the east.  More of the headsail had popped out during the storm so Kadizzle decided to just let the whole sail have at it.  Bob reported from below that the boat was moving at 8.2 knots.  This is faster than the Sovereign is supposed to go.  With following seas however it is possible. Slowly the wind died down and we made the safe harbor of Heaven Bay. The sun came out and a little swim was a good finale.  Wet clothes started to dry and drinks were served.

Someone adopted my child

Xanadu was the first decent sailboat Kadizzle owned.  Last night a fellow called and said he now owned the good old ship.  Kadizzle always had a fondness for that boat.  Our kids grew up sailing on Xanadu, or as Bob called it Carumba.  Storms of the worst sort were endured in the hull of that good ship. The children learned to be calm no matter what.  The family learned that by cooperating we could get through anchors coming loose, unintended jibes, groundings, and you name it.  A fond memory on the Xanadu was a calm evening sailing down the lake.  Megan was five and at the helm.  Erin, mom, and dad were below at the table.  Megan at age five was an ace steering by the compass.  You could tell Megan a heading and she kept the ship on course.  Suddenly out of nowhere a strong gust hit us.  Erin panicked and screamed " Megan is steering".  The boat got knocked down.  Megan with a stern look on her face did not panic.  Megan did what a good sailor should, she pointed the Xanadu into the wind until the gust died.   As soon as the normal wind returned Megan like a little five year old professional put the boat right back on course.  Seeing Megan at age five so confident and doing such a great job is a picture that will always be in Kadizzle's mind.  That confidence has been a trademark of Megan's to this very day. Our two girls learned a lot as crew on Xanadu.  So knowing someone has bought the boat and is going to give it some of the care it needs is great.

The Sun Came up again

Over there towards Washburn the sun came up one more time.  Yesterday Shanika came to the crazy club meeting, which was poorly attended.  A conference call was made to Stroupini. Stroupini is on the West coast for a wedding.  Shanika and Kadizzle took the sailboat out for a stretcher.

Ticklepinch is recovering from her North Dakota vacation with here new decorator cast.  The big news is Smiley McGumphley is eating from a spoon.  Smiley will soon find out there are many things better than mushed carrots. Unfortunately Kadizzle has discovered the endless tongue ticklers one can put in the mouth, such as ice cream and a nice margarita.

So the bumbling goes on. Trump and his cast of clowns continue to shoot their feet off. The whole thing is fun to watch.  The government is at a standstill, but that must be good.  The stock market continues to rise. Kadizzle always thought you could succeed by doing nothing.  Trump has proven him correct.

Today will be a cut the grass day. With the drought there is little grass to cut.  The farmers are whining as usual. They want some good old government welfare.  Of course when they get welfare it is always called help. Republican hate welfare, but seem to like help. It is not the farmers fault that there is not rain, but it is the fault of the poor kid who is born into a poor family with only a mom who works two jobs.  So if you give some money to a farmer it is help, but if you give it to that mom trying to raise a kit, it is welfare, and she is a welfare cheat.  Of course you took her birth control away because you love babies in the womb, but those little bastards are pesky once they pop out and start eating free school lunches.

This explains it all