Me and Boby McGee

It's really me and Jasper Littlebottom.  Jasper and Kadizzle are headed to the lake.  Not much wind, but it will be the first time Littlebottom has sailed this year.  Littlebottom has had too much coffee and is jumping around more than usual like a wild bean.  The ship will be fully stocked with material for gin and tonics, wine, and enough goodies to make it a couple days. Hopefully we can catch up with some of the fleet that is out there. The fleet is limited because so many people had to take their boats out of the water because of the slip disaster. 

Littlebottom is complaining about getting all the crap ready.  When Kadizzle goes by himself it just takes two hamburgers, buns, eggs, butter, and off we go, but not Jasper.  Jasper takes so many little tweakers that Kadizzle cannot list them all.  Kadizzle can lose weight on his own, but when Jasper comes and cooks, well you know what happens.  Jasper is worried that this blog is announcing to all the thieves that we will be gone, so she is going to lock the house.  If you are a thief and planning on robbing us don't waste your time.  There is not much in the house worth stealing.  You will probably lose money on the robbery when you do the math.  When you buy gas, and figure your hourly rate your best bet is to chose a different home.  If you do rob us please take all the stuff Jasper will not let me throw out.  Also most of the stuff that looks expensive is fake.  Please take enough stuff to go over the insurance deductable.  Break everything you can in the master bath because we want to remodel it.  New, computers would be nice, please steal all of them.  If you have any questions about what we would like stolen, please just message us.  Watch what you eat out of the fridge, some of it is pretty old.  Don't get hurt, we don't want any law suits.  Please clean up when you are done, because Kadizzle will be blamed for the mess you make.  Don't touch any ice cream it all has ebola.  Cut the furniture in the living room to shreds like you are looking for money in the cushions, it all needs to be replaced.  When you break in use the back door, the screen does not go up and down the way it should.  Smash the hell out of it.  If you want steal the car and total it. We still owe money on the car.  You could ram the garage door on the right I just tried to fix it, and a new one would be nice.  If we come home and find you have properly robbed us, we will send you a bonus.  If it is a windy day set the house on fire.  We have been trying to sell the house with little luck.  There is plenty of gas in the shed.  If we get a good insurance settlement you could get a big bonus, because there will be no realtor fee, and remember the fire will erase the fingerprints.