The Three Stooges and the Great Payson Experiment
Somewhere between a MAGA rally and a bad rerun of The Three Stooges, three local Tea Party heroes — Steve Otto, Charlie Bell, and Jim Ferris — hatched a plan. They watched Donald Trump lie, cheat, and spin conspiracy gold out of air, and thought, “Hey, why not us?”
Their target wasn’t Washington. It was Payson, Arizona — the perfect test lab for political mischief where few bother to vote in primaries. The Stooges realized if you can get ten angry people in a church basement talking about the “deep state,” you can own the whole town.
So they did what all great political opportunists do: they found the gullible and fed them paranoia. The “deep state” became the town librarian. Fiscal responsibility meant gutting schools. And civic progress — like building a swimming pool for kids — became socialism.
It worked like a charm. The MAGA crowd lapped it up like Bud Light before the boycott. Soon the Stooges were in charge. And what happens when you put three men with the IQ of a ham sandwich in charge? They start wrecking the place.
They tried to defund the library, starve the schools, and now they’re on a crusade to kill the new pool — because, apparently, chlorine is woke. Their latest stunt? Handing all council power to the city manager — the one they picked, of course — turning democracy into a puppet show.
The professionals who once made town government function fled the building. What’s left is the Stooges, their hand-picked “yes man,” and a sinking ship they insist is “running great.”
So, good luck, Payson. The experiment continues. If you’ve ever wondered what would happen if Trumpism ran a small town — congratulations, you’re living in the pilot episode.
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